JonLovitz

The Charlie Sheen Roast just got a little more weird, and significantly more random. Comedy Central announced that former roastee William Shatner, in addition to 'Private Practice' actress Kate Walsh and Jon Lovitz, will be joining Mike Tyson and a slew of stand-up comedians in the public tarring and feathering of America's most embarrassing celebrity.

In addition to those stars, the network also announced that comedians Patrice O'Neal and Amy Schumer will be on the roast dias. Former Guns N' Roses guitarist Slash will also be there, but it's unclear whether he will be a roaster, or just take a long nap under his giant hat.

The full roast roster also includes previously-announced Roastmaster Seth MacFarlane, Mike Tyson, Steve-O, Anthony Jeselnik and RoastMaster General Jeffrey Ross.

Before The Simpsons begat Futurama, current executive producer of The Simspons Al Jean, along with Mike Reiss, created a short-lived animated series about a film critic who hated almost every film he ever saw.

Starring Jon Lovitz in some brilliant voice work, The Critic ran through two networks in two seasons. Like Futurama and Family Guy, it found some success with reruns on cable -- in this case, Comedy Central -- and a subsequent DVD release. But unlike those series, The Critic remains but a distant memory.

Former SNL and High School High star Jon Lovitz will be opening up his own comedy club at the Universal Citywalk on the West Coast. In a display of ego and lack of imagination, it will be called the Jon Lovitz Comedy Club.

Admittedly, I've never seen Lovitz perform stand-up comedy. I sort of figured he had faded into celebrity obscurity like so many before him and would only be seen time-to-time until his inevitable appearances on shows like Dancing With The Stars and Celebrity Boxing. If he got on Celebrity Apprentice, I think Trump would throw him out in the first round based on Lovitz's looks alone (which is both a statement about Lovitz and Trump).

I do wish the guy the best of luck with this business venture. I have been to Citywalk and think a comedy club would be useful and unique there. Hopefully it will last beyond the first year.

Jon Lovitz recently signed a rather Faustian contract with Jamie Masada, the owner of the Laugh Factory comedy club that will require Lovitz to appear on stage at the Los Angeles club every Wednesday for the rest of his life. In addition, Lovitz will write a blog for the Laugh Factory in which he'll offer advice to young comedians.

Really? The rest of his life? That seems so depressing. Will he be bound by his contract to simply sit on the stage in a wheelchair for a twenty-minute set that consists of nothing more than drooling and an occasional story about wars he never actually fought in?