• At 8, ABC has the two-hour season premiere of Dancing With The Stars.
• CBS has a new How I Met Your Mother at 8, followed by new episodes of Old Christine, Two and a Half Men, Rules of Engagement, and CSI: Miami.
• NBC has a new, two-hour Deal Or No Deal at 8, then a new Black Donnellys.
• FOX has new episodes of Prison Break and 24.
• The CW has a new Everybody Hates Chris, then new episodes of All Of Us, Girlfriends, and The Game.
• Also at 8: ABC Family has a new Wildfire.
• At 9, USA has a new Monday Night RAW.
• Lifetime has the new movie The Secrets of an Undercover Wife at 9.
• Food Network has a new Chefography at 9 (on Nigella Lawson), then a new Unwrapped.
• Starting at 8, American Life has Harry O, 77 Sunset Strip, and Bourbon Street Beat.
• At 10, FX has a new ep of The Riches.

Check your local TV listings for more.

• At 8, The New Adventures of Old Christine returns to CBS with two new episodes.
• NBC has a new, two hour Deal Or No Deal at 8, then a new episode of The Black Donnellys.
• There's a new Wildfire on ABC Family at 8.
• Emeril cooks pasta on a new Emeril Live, on Food Network at 8.
• At 9, FOX has a new 24.
• ABC has a new Supernanny at 9, followed by a new What About Brian.
• Bill Maher is the guest on Larry King Live, at 9 on CNN.
• The new movie Cleaverville airs on Lifetime at 9.
• Another new movie at 9: The Kings of South Beach, on A&E.
• GSN has a new High Stakes Poker at 9.
• Also at 9: USA has a new WWE Monday Night RAW.
• At 9:30, CBS has a new Rules of Engagement.
• At 10, FX has the premiere of the new Eddie Izzard/Minnie Driver show The Riches (repeated at 11).
• Discovery has a new Stunt Junkies at 10.

Check your local TV listings for more.

So last night was the first really big Monday night of the new year, with the return of Heroes and Studio 60. And how did those shows fare?

Typical numbers for Studio 60 at 10pm, with around 7.4 million viewers. It was crushed by CSI: Miami, which got 18.7 million viewers. But the big news of the night (well big-ish, I guess) is that Two and a Half Men beat Heroes fairly easily. The Charlie Sheen show got 16.1 viewers, with Heroes getting 14.8 (24 was close, with 14.4). And yes, for you 18 to 49 demographic fans, Heroes won in that race.

That number for CSI: Miami is what I keep thinking about though. My God, almost 19 million for that show? I'm not just saying this because I'm a fan of Studio 60, I'd still say it if it was on Tuesdays at 8 or Saturdays at 9. It just depresses me that this show (and all the CSIs, actually) do that well in the ratings. It must make the network execs scream "hey, we should do more of those shows!"

• On the cover: Julia Louis-Dreyfus might finally have broken the "Seinfeld curse," and what I mean by that is there's no such thing as a stupid Seinfeld curse! The other shows weren't very good, that's all. What's a "curse" about that?
• A rundown on all the May Sweeps action, including the series finales of Alias, Will and Grace, and West Wing, the (possible?) series finale of 7th Heaven, cliffhangers, guest stars, and all that stuff.
• Simon Cowell talks openly about American Idol, American Inventor, and future projects.
• Matt Roush wonders if Commander-In-Chief can be saved, and really loves the new Jesse Stone movie with Tom Selleck.
• TV Guide now has 35,000 blogs on its site.
• How can someone write into TV Guide and ask "Was there a TV show called Route 66?"