'Bad Girls Club'
(10PM, Oxygen) 3rd season premiere
Two things suggest this season of the 'Bad Girls Club' might be even better (which is to say, an even bigger guilty pleasure) than last season: Each episode expands to an hour long, and the line-up of titular bad girls is even more prone to drama than Tanisha, Jennavecia and Cordelia.

The seven new baddies meet up at their swanky new Los Angeles abode in the premiere, and it isn't long before they're hitting the clubs for some boozin' and cruisin' fun.

Of course, where bad girls are concerned, cocktails and fellas usually leads to fights, and by the end of tonight's episode, they'll have thrown down with their fellow partygoers and each other.

'Paris Hilton's My New BFF'
(10PM, MTV) series premiere
What kind of girl would aspire to be a Paris Hilton bestie? Get a look at 'em here, as 16 potential new sidekicks (including two dudes) shack up with Paris and compete in various challenges to try and prove themselves BFF material.

From flying off to Japan, sans luggage, and being told to get themselves red-carpet ready to having to gain entry into Hollywood hotspots when their names are not on the list, the contestants will have to respond to Hilton's every whim if they want to be her new Nicole Richie, or, as Paris puts it, "someone who could be like my sister."

Except that, unlike Paris's actual sister, the new BFF's not getting a cut of the family fortune.

Oh thank God. Paris Hilton is going to England to try and find a new best friend for her reality television show Paris Hilton's My New BFF. Now, rather than subject us to her vapid, debutante antics, she'll be doing the same thing across the Atlantic where they're more used to that sort of behavior.

You know, this is quite an honor for some lucky Brit. There is nobody more loyal, caring and understanding as a friend than Paris Hilton. Just ask Nicole Richie.