I get that American Idol is the biggest thing on television besides the Super Bowl, but do people really get that excited about who's going to sponsor the show? Apparently someone does because FOX sent out a press release today, with great fanfare and a ticker-tape parade with Ryan Seacrest as Grand Marshall decked out in a blue and white sequined tux complete with top hat and a monkey on his shoulder, that Ford, Coca-Cola and AT&T would be the official sponsors of Idol this year.

What does this mean for you, the viewer? It means more retarded Ford commercials. It means more awkward Coca-Cola "moments" where Ryan asks a contestant a random, generic question and gets a confused and empty answer. And it means Ryan will get to say the words AT&T twelve times per contestant as he gives out their phone and text numbers.