(S05E02) "People hear juicy gossip, they're gonna spread it around. This is a firehouse. Take away the rig, the gear, and testosterone, it's nothing but a goddamn sorority in here!" - Needles

I'm not sure truer words have ever been spoken on this show before. Needles summed it up pretty good, huh? He might have been making a joke at Black Shawn's expense, but think about what he's really saying. Get rid of the exterior and the interior of a fireman is the same as everybody else - timid, scared, and emotional. Th arrival of Genvieve Lazard, the french journalist penning the 9/11 book, certainly made that clear on a few occasions for the guys of 62 Truck.

(S05E02) "There's no calling my father off." - Penny

Everybody lies. Some people enjoy the thrill of getting away with it ... and then there's Hurley. While this wasn't a traditional flash-back/flash-forward episode with one character as the focus (hard to say if those will ever be feasible again), this was pretty much a Hurley-centric hour anyway.

As the plot progresses this season, it's going to be interesting to see who becomes important (and who becomes irrelevant) to the ultimate endgame. That being said, we learned one pretty important fact in this episode:

Without Hugo in the mix, "then God help us all."

As amazing as Lost is, I still hate it for one tiny reason - every time a new season begins, I get terrified that I won't "get it." If that happened, it would completely deflate my enjoyment of the show. While Lost has had its fair share of WTF episodes, most of them are decipherable after repeat viewings; season five's first two installments definitely fall into that category. It's like playing the sequel of your favorite video game - for the most part, the controls and game-play are the same, but there are enough changes that it still takes you a few hours to get a handle on it.

(S05E01/S05E02) "The person that invented the phrase 'happily ever after' should have his ass kicked so hard." - Meredith

Another September, another Grey's Anatomy season premiere. Hard to believe that we're already into a fifth season. But you know what isn't hard to believe? That we're still dealing with the same "Meredith and Derek - will they or won't they" mess. Grey's has reached the point that regardless of what happens, I'm going to keep watching it because I've invested too much of my time to walk away now. I really am a fan of the show, which is why I don't feel bad when I say that this was quite possibly the most ridiculous season premiere ever. It was all over the place like some strange metaphor for all the ups and downs Mer and Der have had over the years. A random army doctor, two limousine accidents, ninja attack icicles... and god, the cherry on top - Denny Duquette. Really?

(S05E02) "No indies E! Think of it like the Holocaust - never again!" - Ari

Ever since the beginning of Entourage, I've been waiting for this episode. As much as I love Vince, it's been a long time coming for his "I'll do whatever the hell I want" mentality to finally come full circle and bite him in the ass. His career is in the toilet, Ari even admitted that his worth as an actor "remains to be seen," and E is officially taking his own career more seriously. If Vince wants a comeback, then it's going to be up to him and I love that it's been set up that way. Up until now, his failures have been a direct result partly because of his reliance on Eric and partly because of his own laissez-faire, "what will be will be" attitude. If he screws it all up now, it's his own fault.

(S05E02) "Sing for him John Kruk!" - Chrysanthemum

Wait a second... I'm going over this whole series in my my mind. Did we just get a continuation of a story line? An actual episode that picked up where last week's installment left off? Is ATHF going serial? This is madness! Sure, there are recurring characters that come back now and then, but there's never been an on-going plot that warrants two whole episodes. The one downside (it's really not all that bad), is that we went another week without Frylock, Shake, and Meatwad. But I'm sure they're having plenty of fun with Marcula's military desert spiders or whatever the hell kidnapped them.

(S05E02) "This ain't Aruba, bitch." - Bunk

No... it's not. Of course, Bunk was referring to the Natalee Holloway case from a few years back. The case (which added considerable fuel to the frenzy that surrounds "missing white woman syndrome" in the news outlets) was addressed because of what it implies. The question? What's it take to get noticed? What's it take to get proper news coverage and police investigation? As we've learned, 22 dead black males just don't make the cut. As Bunk and Lester reasoned, you need breasts, white skin, and a cheerleader's outfit for good measure. That or be a tourist.
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(S05E02) "No matter how old I get, these champagne cups seem to be frozen in time." - Fiona

Let the Hollywood exploitation begin! Two episodes into the new season and Ryan Murphy and Co. are already taking advantage of Nip/Tuck's new location. Competing Marilyn Monroe impersonators is something we would have never seen had Sean and Christian decided to stay in Miami. Now that they're out west, I'm quite sure that this will be the first in a long line of Tinseltown degenerates looking for ways to "enhance" themselves and make an extra buck.

(S05E02) One of the things I always found interesting about CSI: Miami was that out of the three shows in the franchise, Miami is the only one that really played up the specialties of it's cast. You know what I'm talking about. Delko is an expert recovery diver, Calleigh has expertise in firearms and ballistics, and Speedle (great character) had a skill too but I forget what. Not sure what Wolfe does but I think Boa Vista is good with DNA or something like that.

Anyway, my whole point here is that the show is unique because it does that. It's like some sort of super team and it looks like we're finally going to get some backstory this season on where everyone honed their skills. First up? Calleigh.