And how do you that? That's easy. Just sprinkle in some sex! It's nature's negotiator.
Of course, it's not as simple as it sounds. These days, people are easier to offend than Catholic nuns and the FCC has made it nearly impossible to advertise products the way God intended (i.e. naked girls with abnormally large boobs writhing and moaning over the awesomeness of Flonase). So an even subtler art of using sex to get your money lies within this deeply layered process. Here are the best of the best and the worst of the worst.
Super Bowl XLII is all done except for the cleanup and the hangovers. And, you are probably doing one of two things right now. Either you are joyously celebrating the win of the Wild Card New York Giants over the undefeated (until Sunday) New England Patriots, or your are cursing out that f@#&ing Tom Brady and coach Bill Belichick for screwing up a perfect season and, most likely, starting a new sports curse in New England.
Oh well, at least you have the commercials to take your mind off of it all if you were a Patriots fan. This year's crop was pretty diverse with a mix of serious and humorous ads. Plus, a little star power thrown in just for taste. Thanks to Jason Hughes, Jen Creer, JJ Hawkins, and yours truly, TV Squad has postings about every new commercial that aired, from the E-Trade baby to the guy who attached jumper cables to his nipples.
If you're scratching your head on what the hell I mean then jump over to the next page, where you'll see a list of links to all of our commercial reviews.
When you think about the Super Bowl, does the name "Ryan Seacrest" come to mind? Probably not. I'm pretty sure I know more about football than Ryan Seacrest (which isn't saying a heck of a lot). Yet somehow, Fox has awarded Super Bowl hosting duties to their American Idol golden boy.
As master of ceremonies for football's biggest game, Ryan will host pregame red-carpet events, as well as the halftime show. Super Bowl XLII is set to take place in February at the University of Phoenix stadium in Arizona. And while halftime entertainment has not yet been announced, I'm starting to suspect that we might see a couple of American Idols perform.
TV Squad Hot Topics
Most Popular Articles
From Our Partners
- The Messengers: Do You Have Faith in The CW's New Supernatural Drama?
- American Idol: What Should the Top 6 Sing for 'Arena Anthems' Week?
- TVLine Items: Weeds Star Joins Preacher, Masters Kid Cast and More
- Arrow: 10 Things to Know About the Sexy, Scary Return to Nanda Parbat
- Vampire Diaries EP on Caroline's Next Move: 'Her Danger Knows No Bounds'
- More From TVLine
- 2015 ACM Awards: Star Sightings
- Sofia Vergara Refutes Ex-Fiance's Claims She Wanted Frozen Embryos Destroyed
- Meet Country Music's Next Superstar: Thomas Rhett
- 'Love & Mercy' Trailer Promises You'll Never Listen to the Beach Boys the Same Again
- Garth Brooks Counts Down ACMs Weekend With '#GarthGrams'
- More From ET