Well, ain't that a kick in the head? The Real Wives of New York has one less wife on the roster, so it seems. Luann deLesseps has been dumped. The Countess deLesseps -- as she prefers to be called – and her rarely seen Count of a hubby, Alex, have apparently broken up.

While I take no joy in anybody's marriage breaking up, this news is especially ironic in light of this season of Bravo's Real Wives of New York City. Not only has Luann been particularly overconfident about the right way to do things, but she was also prickly as a pear when another wife, Ramona Singer, observed that the Count was twice as old as Luann. The Countess went off like a firecracker when she heard that, and she was not forgiving of Ramona when she offered an apology.

Children's television is the ultimate pacifier. Where else in the world can a terrible, horrific monster that destroys both life and property with nary a whiff of sympathy be turned into a soft, cuddly character who has his own line of soft, cuddly dolls being sold at the local Wal-Mart? It's only later in life, after they've adjusted to these de-fanged monsters, do they realize that their beliefs were so wrong. Aaaannnddd, that's where the therapy comes in.

But, we're not here to talk about the emotional problems that are paralyzing you today. We're here to talk about those vampires, ghosts and mummies that were stripped down and made to be funny, clumsy and even musically oriented. After the jump you'll see a few examples of what I mean. Don't worry, they won't scare you...they've been homogenized for your nightmare-free pleasure.