We all have tremendous respect for you, Frost/Nixon writer Peter Morgan (yes, that is what I call him when we're hanging out drinking espressos and doing the crosswords), but do you really think the Clinton story America is just dying to see dramatized is the relationship between former president Bill and former UK Prime Minister Tony Blair? Unless "The Special Relationship," as they're calling it, involves a special blue suit Mr. Blair kept for no explainable reason without cleaning it, I think there's better Clinton dramatics to be had.

Even if you don't go with the most sensational stories, there is a certain historic Presidential campaign. Hell, tell both stories from her perspective, that should be fun. Casting, should HBO greenlight the film, has Dennis Quaid playing Bill, Julianne Moore taking on the current Secretary of State Hillary Clinton, and Michael Sheen (who played Frost in the aforementioned Frost/Nixon) playing Tony Blair. This would be his third film appearance as Blair, which makes you wonder if more people think Blair looks like Sheen than Blair.

"Mess O' Potomac": Bush delivered an interesting little speech to the Associated General Contractors of America, and it raised a few eyebrows. Baghdad Bureau Chief Aasif Mandvi talked about Bush's views and expectations of Iraq. That Baltimore line was brilliant. It's funny because it's true!... and really scary! I recently moved to Baltimore, so I've looked up all the crazy statistics. Did you know that the city's murder rate is five times that of New York City? Yeah. Cue "The More You Know" star.

In a recent interview with Barbara Walters, who actually died four years ago, Bill O'Reilly bragged (it was so totally bragging) that he's on Al Qaeda's death list. HA! First of all, what makes O'Reilly think that Al Qaeda really gives a shit about him? Second of all, as Jon said, "Don't know if you've seen the Al Qaeda tapes... We're kind of ALL on Al Qaeda's hit list." I guess O'Reilly briefly forgot about the "America" part of "Death to America".

Jon Stewart begins with news about the ongoing war on terror, of course. FOX network hit the country hard with news about how the terrorists are using media to spread hate. Do tell! They elaborate on this shocking new fact by... showing the hateful videos. One video is voice-overed by FOX people with, "It seems to be a training video on making a bomb. Should we even be showing this?" Stewart screams at the camera, "No!" Oh, FOX, you silly, silly network.