Ah, the celebrity roast. Comedy Central resurrected the tried and true comedian ass-kiss off with hilarious specials featuring Denis Leary, Flavor Flav, Bob Saget and William #*$&$ing Shatner. Then came the capper: a roast of music legend Willie Nelson. It was a shift in evolution so great, it could have made Charles Darwin buy into the theory of intelligent design.

Then the network caused a global groan so loud that it shifted the tectonic plates when they announced that Nelson had to cancel and they would replace him with Larry the Cable Guy.

It's such an obvious and safe choice that might be a good recipe for ratings, but it's a sure fire recipe for boring. Here are the iconic stars who would have made much better kindling for a white hot comedy roast.