(S02E23) 361 seaports. 16 million containers. 9 H5 sub-types. 1 mutation.

Someone want to explain to me what's with all this bird-flu nonsense all of a sudden? I realize it's out there. I understand the extremely scary threat that it poses. But do we really need all this crazy television coverage? First ABC has that bird-flu TV movie, and now CBS has an entire episode of Numb3rs devoted to it. I guess people just like to be scared.

Fortunately, this episode had a lot of other good stuff happening. Larry is back, and it's a good thing. His comic relief was sorely missed in last week's episode. Plus, the romance between Charlie and Amita has started to heat up... well, sort of.

May 4th was Cinco de Mayo Eve, the night when drunken stockbrokers tumble through civilian chimneys once the kids are in bed.

"Revenge of the Birds": The ol' H5-NI fear has been running rampant and the government finally stepped up and released its plans to combat any potential outbreak in the National Strategy for Pandemic Influenza report. Here's a synopsis: "We dunno what to do, we dunno what to do, we dunno!" Jon suggested an alternate title for the Strategy... "RUN!"

Is ABC trying to freak out their audience? I just saw a preview for their May Sweeps flick Fatal Contact: Bird Flu In America. Jeez, people shaking hands and getting sick, millions dead, the military called in, the President making a dire annoucement. Sure, it's all possible, but I just get this sick feeling that ABC is trying to scare us. Avian Flu plus May Sweeps = ratings gold!

I just hope the movie is a little bit more responsible than what I've seen in the previews. I mean, what about the kids watching? What about the health care professionals? And for God's sake, What About Brian?

Lately, there isn't a day that goes by where we don't here something about the bird flu that may, or may not, be passed along to humans. Not to get too freaky, but experts are saying that a worst case scenario would be 20 million Americans affected, 2 million dead, schools and businesses shutdown to prevent the spread of the disease. So, you would think that the networks' entertainment divisions would give us something light and fluffy to keep our minds off of this fact.

Um, apparently not.

Disney-owned ABC, who gave us the nuclear war disaster movie The Day After back in the 1980's, will air Fatal Contact: Bird Flu in America during the May sweeps period. The movie will star Stacy Keach, Joely Richardson, Ann Cusack and Justine Machado, and will ask the question 'What if bird flu was transmitted to humans in America?'. The producers say they made the movie because of its topicality.

Personally, I'll be skipping this movie and look for some more gentle fare, like 10.5:Apocalypse on NBC.