The new season of Man vs. Food starts tomorrow on Travel Channel. If you've never seen it, host Adam Richman goes around to various eating establishments across the country and eats stuff. Not just anything on a menu, we're talking about giant hamburgers, a 13-pound pizza, 12 egg omelets, stuff like that. In tomorrow's episode he eats a burger so hot he has to wear gloves.

For once I'm not talking about any of the Burger King spots that have that creepy King guy, with his terrifying blank stare and equally scary son. No, I'm talking about the commercial with the guy hiding in a motel late at night, eating one of the new Cheesy Bacon Tender Crisp chicken sandwiches. A cow shows up at the door to confront him ... because the guy isn't eating burgers.

Huh? Why would a cow -- which is made of burgers -- be upset that a customer isn't eating him or his friends? Does he own stock in the company and wants customers to eat burgers instead of chicken? That wouldn't even make sense because even if the cow did hold some BK stock* selling chicken would be just as good as selling meat. Or maybe this is an example of the "death wish" type of advertising that Pete Campbell talked about in the Sterling Cooper pitch to Lucky Strike?

Even those cute M&M guys don't go around saying "eat me."

*This will probably be the only time in my life that I write about cows owning stock in a corporation.

(S02E04) Finally! Chef Gordon Ramsay says what I - and most of America, I'm sure - have been saying since the first episode: these contestants aren't chefs, they're just a bunch of fast food cooks, and none of them are fit to run a multi-million dollar restaurant at a billion dollar hotel. Yes! One of the truer moments in reality TV show history.

This week the teams not only have to get through their fourth service, but also have to make lunch for the first time - for several screaming, hyper kids.