What is cool? Can you define that thing, that quality that makes certain characters seem like they're more with it than everyone around them? Maybe cool is a state of being, not a thing you can pick up by wearing Armani or drinking Grey Goose or driving a BMW.

As I was looking around the current crop of television shows, I found ten characters who seem to capture the essence of cool -- whether they know it or not. After the jump, we count them down.

It's report card time. From time to time, the TV Squad Soap Report will take a look at a show and grade it accordingly. This week, we'll look at General Hospital -- you know, sort of take its temperature. To put it bluntly, General Hospital needs some intensive care. The show is suffering from post-dramatic stress disorder, not traumatic, dramatic. I'm speaking specifically of the shooting of Michael Corinthos, Jr.

Intellectually and from a writer's point of view, I understand why Robert Guza, Jr. -- the head writer -- decided to do this story. It's caused a major upheaval in the Jason-Carly-Sonny-Jax quadrangle. The situation he created, for those who haven't been watching, is this: Sonny's new love, Kate, urged Sonny to bring Michael to the coffee warehouse so he could see the legitimate side of his father's business interests and presumably be impressed enough to want to emulate him. Sonny had been worried that Michael was on the path to becoming a mini-mobster.
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• FOX has the Coca-Cola 600 Nextel Cup race all night (starts at 5).
• At 7, CBS has a new 60 Minutes.
• NBC has a new Dateline at NBC.
• At 8, PBS has the National Memorial Day Concert.
• Food Network has a new Emeril Live at 8, followed by a new Iron Chef America and the All-Star Grill Fest: South Beach special.
• Also at 8: TCM has Houseboat, with Cary Grant and Sophia Loren, followed by Yours, Mine & Ours, with Lucille Ball and Henry Fonda.
• At 8:30, TNT has the Pistons/Cavaliers NBA playoffs game.
• At 9, HBO has the new movie Bury My Heart At Wounded Knee.

Check your local TV listings for more.