(S04E05) "Even The Hoff couldn't rescue us today." - Piers, about how bad the auditions had been that day in L.A.

Are we there yet? I enjoy watching America's Got Talent and all the various acts, but the audition process is once again this year torturing me. There are way too many audition episodes. Can't they cut down on the number of audition episodes and put some on the Internet as extra content? They could tease us with a quick montage and say that to see more of these acts we just have to go online. Are you with me on this?

Luckily, auditions installments are soon over and episodes will focus on better acts than the toe dancer or the 7th cousin to Celine Dion who thinks she got the Dion singing gene!

I think all of these Bud ads are trying to push across one major point: if beer is involved, men don't make very good decisions.

I'm offended by this notion. Except when it comes to women, of course. We've all been there, right guys? But to say that a man driving along a spooky dark road with his girlfriend would pick up a scraggly hitch hiker carrying an axe just because he's also carrying a case of Bud Light...that's stretching it. Why is he carrying a case of Bud Light? Where did he get it? Did he take it when he killed a bunch of people at a party? And like I said earlier, this is Bud Light we're talking about.

You just know he's going to pick up the guy with the chainsaw at the end too, and then they'll be in trouble. Or maybe he'll fight the other hitch hiker, a la Freddy vs. Jason.