chris daughtry

What exactly is 'Chris Daughtry-itis?' Does it involve a fever and a rash? Does it cause baldness? And most importantly, is it curable?

Simon Cowell complained in this week's Entertainment Weekly that the current batch of finalists just don't want to win badly enough. And this laid-back attitude is effecting their "A Game," or creating a lack thereof.

Simon said, "I think that we suffer from Jennifer Hudson- and Chris Daughtry-itis, which is people who didn't win getting great careers and now a lot of the contestants believing it absolutely doesn't matter."

Oh man, I've been patiently twiddling my thumbs for the last 3 hours until the finale aired on the West Coast, so I could finally post this. Taylor Hicks is our new American Idol, and I couldn't be happier. Well, I could be (sigh...Chris). But if I can't have Chris, then I'm happy with the Silver Fox. (I hate that nickname by the way. It makes me feel like I've got a crush on an old man. What's the opposite of being a pedophile? Is there a word for that? 'Cause I might have it.) They really took it down to the last minute too. I was biting my nails at 1 hour and 59 minutes, worried that my TiVo was about to pop up with the dreaded "Erase Now? or Save?" quandary. I felt like I was Mr. Eko on Lost, watching that damn clock. But right at the final seconds, Ryan said Taylor's name. Yes! The crazy windmill-dancing bastard pulled it off! I understand why Taylor's dad was crying, but why was David Hasselhoff?

My favorite thing about the Idol finale isn't the performances, but playing "Where's Waldo?" with the random B-list celebrities in attendance. My question is, why do some of them get their names closed captioned while others do not? And, who was the nitwit that mistakenly identified Tori Spelling as one of "Taylor's Family & Friends"?

I have to admit that I wasn't really excited about tonight...  

I'll confess to this -- I did cry after watching Elliott's homecoming footage. I'm not the type of person who typically cries at a reality show montage, especially for one involving an Amish leprechaun (as one reader expertly described him.) But I'll fess up to crying tonight. I sniffled and thought, "man, it's going to be sad when he gets eliminated tonight." But then I shrugged my shoulders and remembered ... I don't like Elliott. Never have. But my tears were real, and not faux like Ryan's sexuality or Paula's boobs. I am slightly embarrassed that I broke down so easily. But hey, you gotta admit that seeing his mom choke up during Elliott's parade was a tear jerking Music/Variety/Game Show moment.

It was a good send off for a kid that nobody really thought would make it this far. (Oh, except Paula, of course.)

Anna Johns asks a very important question -- with Chris gone, does anybody still care about American Idol? My answer is yes and no. Chris was my number one dude, and I'm destroyed that he's gone. The thrill of the game has left me. I no longer feel the shrill of excitement every Tuesday when Chris takes the stage. I am now filled with blood lust, and I thirst for the demise of Elliott. I don't blame America for Chris' untimely elimination. I blame Elliott. I'm not exactly sure why, but somehow he is at fault. It's certainly not me. Taylor deserves to be in the finale, and so did Chris. Katharine? Eh, I guess. Elliott? Not so much.

With Chris gone, I have a new reason to watch Idol. I want Taylor to destroy them. Destroy them all. When we first met Taylor, he seemed the most unlikely candidate for American Idol. He's got gray hair. He's kinda tubby. And he looks like he's taking a dump when when he sings. This whole season has been absurd, so why not end it with a fireworks display of absurdity. I want Elliott and Katharine to be buried alive under the avalanche of votes that Taylor will receive. I want every man, woman, and child to vote for Taylor. I want more Americans to vote for Taylor then there are actually in America. I want Mexicans to illegally swarm over the border like locusts, with their Cingular Wireless phones in hand, just so they can vote for Taylor. I want him to destroy those other two. I want Taylor to rise from Chris' fallen ashes and pour acid rain all over Elliott and Katharine. I know that being bitter over Chris won't bring him back, but it makes me feel a hell of a lot better.