crowd

Apparently, he sucks ass. At least, that's what a man has written on a sign which he held up behind Hannity's partner Alan Colmes during a live segment of Hannity and Colmes that was captured thanks to a Tivo user. The veracity of Hannity's alleged ass sucking notwithstanding, I think we can all agree it's just plain rude to do something like this in public. The best way to tell someone they suck ass is to write it inside a card, seal the card in an envelope, don a top hat and tails, and present it to them while bowing politely. This is all laid out in chapter 13 of Emily Post's 1922 book Etiquette; it's right after the chapter on how to inform someone they're a douchebag by sewing the word into a cloth napkin. Seriously, people.

When the main emphasis of your ABC special is trying to hold your breath for longer than eight minutes and fifty-eight seconds, the special itself probably doesn't need to be longer than a half an hour. You can try to stretch it to an hour, but you'd have to add a lot of filler. If you go for two hours, then the special becomes both an endurance test for the magician and  the home audience.

Well, as you probably know by now, David Blaine did not break the record for holding one's breath underwater the longest. Granted, if he actually did spend seven days underwater and his body had taken the punishment it supposedly had, lasting for seven minutes and eight seconds was a feat in and of itself. Of course, to get to that point we had to sit through a lot of shots featuring Blaine sitting underwater among sharks and stingrays, or falling into water, or talking about water. Also, we get to hear about his "journey" to his "human aquarium" at Lincoln Center, including all the crazy stunts he had done up to that point.