dolls

There are many TV shows that are a natural when it comes to making dolls and action figures for them: Lost, Heroes, Star Trek. Maybe even those bobbleheads of Dwight from The Office. But dolls for America's Next Top Model? That makes as much sense as a line of dolls for The McLaughlin Group ("I'll trade you my Pat Buchanan for the Eleanor Clift!"), but they're here, and they're scary.

(S01E02) As I watched this week's episode, I could only think one thing...thank goodness there are only nine finalists, cause I really can't take much more of this show, in fact, in deference to the people who like this show (both of them) this is going to be my last review.

The first big event of the show is when the girls move into their new house. After the required fifteen minutes of screaming and running with their hands in their air, they finally choose their beds. Was I the only one aroused by the girl who licked her pillow?

(S01E01) Are you the only person on earth who isn't sick of the song "Don't Cha?" Well, you're in luck. You can hear it over and over again on the newest reality show from the CW.

Pussycat Dolls Present: The Search for the Next Doll is the perfect show to audition for if you are too slutty for American Idol, too untalented for America's Next Top Model and too stupid for The Apprentice.

You may remember the host of the show, Mark McGrath as the lead singer of the band Sugar Ray. Personally, I have a hard time respecting someone who quits being one of the handsomest lead singers around to become a poor man's Chris Harrison.

Also, on hand, is the founder of the Dolls herself, Robin Antin. For you Blow Out fans, Robin is Jonathan Antin's more masculine sister. In the opening, Robin says the Pussycat Dolls are "always evolving." Sadly, that statement does not apply to Robin herself.

The show resembles Thunderbirds in some ways, except it uses dolls rather than marionettes. The dolls have no real decernible mouth movements, and the whole show seems less like an action adventure and more like watching people playing with dolls for half an hour. Those lackluster production values could almost be forgiven if the characters, especially Scar, weren't so cloying. Scar is meant to be the comic relief, but his lines are delivered with all the grace and subtly of an egg beater being crammed up your nose. By the end of the episode I wanted to take their dolls away until they promised never to make a show like this again.

A bit of research revealed that Wulin Warriors is actually an Americanized version of a popular Taiwanese program. Therefore, I'll allow that perhaps something (or everything) was lost in the translation. Cartoon Network has always tried to place the best shows in its "speciality" blocks like Toonami and Adult Swim, and I'm not sure exactly how something this lackluster made it to air. Apparently thirteen episodes of the show have been created, and if it lasts beyond that, I'll be surprised.