dustin diamond

Dustin Diamond is really starting to get on my nerves. First, in order to change his image from the screechy-voiced character he played on the NBC Saturday-morning sitcom Saved by the Bell he became a foul-mouthed comedian (like we don't have those already). Recently, much to the anger of his fans, he decided to sell $20 t-shirts to save his Wisconsin home from being foreclosed upon.. And now, he's giving out sex advice saying, among many things, that he could write a book on the sexual moves that he has tried and tested and that you need to tap your partner so hard they fall asleep.

I don't know if this is some sort of long-term plan of Dustin's to have us forget that he played the role of Screech for nearly a decade. Or, maybe it's just him trying to drum up some new publicity for himself. I can't read his mind, so I don't know the definitive answer. However, I do know one thing . . .

No matter what he does, he'll still be Screech.

Yesterday, Dustin Diamond, best known as Screech from Saved by the Bell, appeared on the Howard Stern show. During the appearance, he mentioned, among other things (let's just say the number "10" came up somewhere in the conversation... that's all I'll say about that) that he signed a messed-up land contract to get his house in Wisconsin, and for various reasons, he's about to lose it. As part of his efforts, he is selling t-shirts online for $15 ($20 if you want them signed by Dustin).

It's not that he's destitute; Diamond tours the country as a stand-up comic. It's just that he had bad credit and had to rely on some shady people in order to get the house. He doesn't want to sell (though he'd make a profit) and wants to stay right where he is. So if you felt bad for Screech or identified with him (I certainly did), or just laughed at his Screechiness, go to Dustin's site and buy a shirt. Or just go to the site and laugh at him. It's up to you.

(Update: for all of the readers who are about to write, "Well, he should just get the money from his father, Neil Diamond, or his brother, Mike Diamond from the Beastie Boys," just stop right now. He is not related to either Diamond. Need proof? Look here.)

This poll is from Stuff Magazine, which I read for the numerous pics of half naked or naked women posing on a bed or jumping around the surf investigative journalism. The mag polled readers about which former child star they'd like to punch in the face. The results:

Danny  Bonaduce - 38%
Corey Feldman - 38%
Dustin Diamond (Screech, Saved By The Bell) - 15%
Ron Howard - 9%

OK, I can understand some of those, but Opie? Opie?!