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by Bob Sassone, posted Apr 29th 2005 4:30PM

"One year I had to take my cousin to the prom, and I don't know who was more embarrassed, me or him." - David Letterman
"Giving advice is so much easier than living." - Trish, to Meg, about dating, on Eyes.
"Oceanic flight 815 nonstop to Sydney now boarding at gate 17..." - airport announcement, on Alias.
"Am I wrong to worry when our houses of worship start sounding like they could fight Godzilla?" - Jon Stewart, about a "mega-church" in Louisiana, on The Daily Show.