It's about freaking time! Say what you want about the quality of television, but the American Idol auditions are the greatest two weeks known to man. I sincerely think that this is what Ben Franklin had in mind when he invented electricity. And Chicago was given the honor of being this season's first city to be ripped to shreds by Simon. What surprises me about Chicago isn't its lack of talent (yes, I know they air the worst auditions), but that I spotted at least two Mike Ditka impersonators. Mike Ditka? It's been 20 years since the Bears won the Super Bowl. It's time to let 1985 go, Chicago.