Zachary Johnson and Jeffrey Max are two effed up dudes.

Before they hit the "viralsphere" with Lasagna Cat, the production team and creative geniuses behind Fatal Farm created an incredibly twisted, brilliantly subversive, and unarguably hilarious series of "alternative intros" parodying the openings to classic sitcoms. No two intros follow the same theme or formula, except to say that they're all unequivocally... Messed. Up.

From blood and guts to go-carts and the hinting of pedophilia, each parody brings with it an innate ability to eviscerate any leftover nostalgia from the sight of, say, the Happy Days jukebox or the beginning chords of the theme to Cheers. (Believe us, you'll never think of Rhea Perlman the same way again.)

Strap in, sit back, and take an incredibly disturbing trip down Memory Lane, courtesy of your friendly tour guides at Fatal Farm:

We have a TV Royalty category here at TV Squad, and if there's anyone who worked in television and deserved the honor it's Bill Melendez.

Melendez was an animator for Walt Disney Studios in the 1930 and 40s, working on such classic movies as Fantasia and Pinocchio and Mickey Mouse shorts, then went on to make tons of movies, cartoons and commercials (he worked on many Bugs Bunny shorts and other famous cartoons) for well-known companies such as United Productions of America (where he was an animator on Gerald McBoing McBoing) and Playhouse Pictures. He then met Charles Schulz in 1959 and went on to animate (and often direct and produce) most of the Peanuts TV specials, including A Charlie Brown Christmas, A Boy Named Charlie Brown, It's The Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown, A Charlie Brown Thanksgiving, and many, many others. Many people don't know this but he was also the voice of both Snoopy and Woodstock (they didn't talk, of course, but he did all of the howls and other noises). He worked on TV versions of Cathy and Garfield too.

Here are the new TV DVDs, in stores tomorrow.

• American Idol - Season 6 Finale
• The Chase - Season 1
• Drawn Together - Season 3 Uncensored
• Galaxy Rangers - The Collection: Vol. 1
• Garfield and His Friends - A Cat and His Nerd
• The Incredible Hulk Returns and The Trial of The Incredible Hulk
• Lovejoy - Season 3
• The Magnificent Seven - Complete Series
• Mission: Impossible - Season 4
• The Rat Patrol - Complete Series
• Saturday Night Live - Season 3
• Sinatra (mini-series)
• Stargate: Infinity - Complete Series
• Two and a Half Men - Season 3

New TV DVDs, in stores tomorrow (a whole bunch!).

• Batman Beyond - Season 3
• Christy - Complete Series
• Deadliest Catch - Season 1
• Garfield and Friends - An Ode To Odie
• JAG - Season 3
• Justice League Unlimited - Season 2
• Kong: The Animated Series - Vol. 1 and Vol. 2 and gift set
• Masters of Horror - Pro Life
• Maude - Season 1
• McHale's Navy - Season 1
• Miami Vice - Season 3 and Season 4
• Mythbusters - Mega Movie Myths
• Newsradio - Final Season
• Run's House - Season 1 and Season 2
• Sleeper Cell - Season 2
• The Wild, Wild West - Season 2

Check out the picture on the right. It just looks like a plastic bust of Homer Simpson, but it's actually a radio. The eyeballs are the tuning and volume knobs, which I guess means that while listening to the radio Homer takes on the appearance of "incredibly brain damaged Homer" complete with wandering eyes. I also found this SpongeBob SquarePants shower radio, this Tweety Bird combination phone and clock radio on eBay, and this Garfield radio (did you know he's coming back to TV?) which is very similar to one my brother had when we were younger, except his was a clock radio and the alarm was Garfield's voice saying, "time to wake up, sleepy head." If you pressed his nose / snooze button, Garfield would say, "Nah, don't get up. Stay in bed, sleep longer."

Now I'm curious: does anyone out there have any unique promotional toys for old (or new) TV shows that stand out from the usual plastic crap you can find in large chain stores? Let loose in the comments, this is your chance to break out your awesome toys and make everyone else jealous. Yes, it's childish, but what's the point of having these collectibles if not to make other people jealous?

Mark Evanier has a post about a brand new Garfield cartoon for television that he's writing, or rather, that he'll be writing sometime soon. Evanier was also a writer on the popular Garfield and Friends series that ran on CBS from 1988 to 1995. Paws, Inc. is producing and distributing the new series worldwide along with Dargaud Marina S.A. in Paris, France.

The new Garfield series will be computer animated, though Evanier does say it will not be the same CGI Garfield from the movies. Evanier is also voice directing for the series and says that Bill Murray will not be playing the hefty, lasagna-loving feline. There's also no word just yet on where the new series will air.