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November 25, 2014

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Eight Shows Least Deserving of an Emmy Nomination

by Danny Gallagher, posted Jun 24th 2010 4:00PM
Jeff Dunham and Achmed the Dead TerroristIt's a shame that television doesn't have the equivalent of the Razzies, an award that extends much needed raspberries. It's such a veritable gold mine of sub-standard entertainment that the list of nominees could circle the globe twice and the awards show itself would take three days.

Then again, the Emmys are long enough.

Thanks to this lack of a punching bag for bad television, tons of horrific, terrible and just plain bad shows don't get the golden punch to the groin that they so richly deserve. They simply crawl back into the darkness unscathed, fresh-faced and ready to strike again. So in honor of Bob's "Nine People and Shows that Deserve Emmy Nominations," here are the shows that would have won big at the Emmys ... in the Bizarro World!

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Blago not done with reality TV, our sanity

by Danny Gallagher, posted Oct 9th 2009 7:07PM
Rod BlagojevichIf you thought Rod Blagojevich was done with television after the I'm a Celebrity debacle, then you don't know Rod.

An unidentified source close to team Blago confirmed that the ousted Illinois governor will compete on the upcoming season of The Celebrity Apprentice.

Of course, NBC wouldn't confirm the info until the network makes an official announcement or maybe it just didn't want to come to terms with the fact that are giving the human spotlight once more chance on TV. I'm sure it's the first one.

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The results are in, and you voted Speidi off of E!

by Jason Hughes, posted Jun 23rd 2009 2:02PM
Spencer Pratt & Heidi MontagSo E! ran a poll to see if their viewers wanted the network to stop covering the train wreck that is Speidi. Okay. Sure, that's fun. And by a startling 94% margin you have spoken, and you don't want E! covering Spencer Pratt and Heidi Montag anymore. Even more surprising is that E! has agreed to follow this edict by their viewers and limit Spiedi stories only to life-altering or -ending events.

I think the celebrity-fueled tabloid news networks and magazines should look at these results and think about it. Speidi has been fueling many gossip stories the past few weeks, and here we find that nearly 100% of people don't want to hear it. And E! fans are gossipy fans to begin with.

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Gossip stream says Dickinson packed up to Costa Rican hospital

by John Scott Lewinski, posted Jun 16th 2009 10:02AM
Janice Dickinson ran out of luck when she ran out of water on her most recent reality show.A mysterious source close to the production of I'm a Celebrity! Get Me Out of Here! reports that Janice Dickinson tapped out of the show after being rushed to a Costa Rican hospital this weekend.

While some were hoping that she was institutionalized for a personality transplant, it turns out she was reportedly suffering from dehydration, depending on which source you find.

There's some debate on whether severe dehydration is more dangerous than actually being in a Costa Rican hospital, but she's said to be nowhere near the reality show's set.

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If you keep watching crap like I'm a Celebrity they'll just make more

by Jason Hughes, posted Jun 3rd 2009 3:28PM
I'm a Celebrity... Get Me Out of HereWe must really like our televisions to be filled with crap. After all, as a country we continue to support it with nice, big, juicy ratings. Take NBC's I'm a Celebrity... Get Me Out of Here debuted with 6.4 million viewers, enough for number one on the night, beating out The Bachelorette. I didn't watch it, but our own Jackie contributed to that number. I got enough of Sanjaya on American Idol thank you very much. Plus, I saw Stephen Baldwin being interviewed for this on Late Night and right there I'd had enough of the whole show.

But not America, apparently. Maybe it was all the hoopla about Heidi and Spencer (The Hills) quitting after like 20 minutes because no one would rub their feet or whatever. Did those horrible promos featuring Sanjaya getting set upon by bees really make you want to watch? Was it the last addition of Frangelina? Mrs. Rod Blagojevich? Or is it the car wreck lookie-loo phenomenon?

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I don't think I can take four nights a week of pseudo-celebs

by Jackie Schnoop, posted Jun 2nd 2009 10:02AM
Stephen Baldwin, Sanjaya Malakar, and a celebrity Okay. Out of desperation to escape from rerunland, I watched I'm a Celebrity, Get Me Out of Here! What I didn't realize is the time commitment expected if I dare get involved. Two hours for the premiere tonight. I can deal with that. But then, as they aired the show, they mentioned it will be on four nights a week -- Monday through Thursday evenings. Yikes! Thankfully, it's only an hour for the remaining nights and it's less than a four-week season.

However, it would be nice if I had any sort of clue as to who these pseudo-celebs are. I know who Lou Diamond Phillips and Stephen Baldwin are, of course. Stephen is the lesser Baldwin doomed to be on shows which remind him he's a celebrity. Because I'm an American Idol watcher, I know Sanjaya. But who are the rest of these people, and why do they think they're all that?

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NBC says all Blagojevichs are the same, casts one for I'm a Celebrity

by Jason Hughes, posted May 21st 2009 3:49PM
Patti & Rod BlagojevichNow that Saturday Night Live is off the air, what's the fun in former Illinois governor Rod Blagojevich doing anything if we can't have it made fun of on "Weekend Update?" The biggest douchebag in the Midwest, and I can say that because I live there, wasn't allowed to join Sanjaya on NBC's summer reality show because of that whole legal matter. So NBC, proving how "FOX-y" they can be, have now signed Mrs. Rod Blagojevich to join I'm a Celebrity...Get Me Out of Here this summer.

Now, I support the decision to not allow Rod there because he'd either be taking hits out on fellow celebrities (wait a minute ... Sanjaya will be there) or he'd just disappear altogether. But in an era where getting rejected by a bachelor can make you a "Star" worthy of Dancing, it still boggles my mind that being married to a jackass is enough. We don't know anything about Patti Blagojevich except for her terrible taste in men. Kristen Wiig hasn't even developed an impression of her and now she's going to be on a major summer reality show?

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Blagojevich joining reality show...and it's not Cops

by Danny Gallagher, posted Apr 15th 2009 10:02AM
Former Illinois Governor Rod Blagojevich

When Illinois Gov. Rod Blagojevich was finally indicted and impeached, I breathed a sigh of relief and hoped that would be the last we would ever see of him.

Then I heard he might be coming back to haunt my TV like the ghost of an angry relative, and the nerves in my whole body stiffened. Would we once again have to spend all of our remaining TV time dodging the naysaying and the placating and the denying that is the Rod Blagojevich variety hour?

Then when I heard he was going to be on an NBC reality show, I again breathed a sigh of relief, comforted by the fact that no one would see him.

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