homer

(S18E07) I usually take on the role of apologist when it comes to The Simpsons, defending it against those who say it's not as good as it was in the early years. I still maintain the series is the funniest and smartest thing on network television, but even I can admit when an episode isn't quite up to snuff, and this one was nowhere near snuff, up to it or otherwise.

I'm enough of a fan of the show that even a mediocre episode still has enough to entertain me, and there were a few moments in this episode I thought were pretty funny, such as the dead ice cream man being buried with a giant ice cream scoop, or Homer taking Polaroids of himself to show Marge how sad he was that he wrecked her popsicle stick sculptures, but the basic plot had been done before (Homer upsets Marge by not taking enough of an interest in her and finally redeems himself in the end) and it's been done better.

The new trailer for The Simpsons Movie is now online-- it also aired on Fox last Sunday night during The Simpsons. It doesn't show much, except a fluffy bunny and Homer getting stuck between a rock and a hard place. The Wikipedia page for the movie says Erin Brockovich, Minnie Driver, and Albert Brooks all have roles. Plus, we'll see old, familiar characters such as SideShow Bob and Fat tony. The plot of the movie is being kept under wraps.

The Simpsons Movie trailer is on the Apple Trailers website. The movie comes out July 27, 2007.

[Via Pop Candy]

(S18E05)

Homer: I'm not gonna surrender. You've seen what the U.S. Army does to prisoners. How would you like to be stacked naked in a pile with a hillbilly girl pointin' at you and laughin'?

Cletus: That was our last Christmas card.

Homer: Yeah, Marge always loved your cards.

If you missed the premiere of the Simpsons Movie trailer, check it out here. July can't get here soon enough, and being in Minnesota, I mean that in more ways than one.

No spoilers in this preview, Simpsons fans.

I'll have a few review when the episode airs on November 5, but here's a taste of what you can look forward to:

The first vignette, titled "Married to the Blob," spoofs the classic camp classic The Blob, this time with Homer becoming an ever-enlarging mass of man-blob who just can't stop himself from eating every person he comes across. As always, it takes Marge to finally talk some sense into Homer, with a little help from guest star Dr. Phil.

(S18E03) This episode ventured into familiar territory, giving us yet another story where Homer acts like a jerk towards Marge and has to redeem himself by the end. If I were the sort of person who graded these episodes, I'd probably give this on a B minus. The plot was decent enough, and there were several moments I thought were really clever, but as a whole the episode didn't quite woo me.

Anyway, if you're reading this that means you've seen the episode, so you know Marge decides to delve into the Time-Life Carpenter's Library book set Homer purchased at the run down mall, the same place where he consumed a pillar of out-of-date, hardened gummi worms. Marge catches on quickly and is soon building everything from nightstands to extravagant dog houses, prompting Bart to call her "the Jesus of carpentry."

(S18E01) When Bart refuses to let Lisa sit with him on the bus, she tries to complain to Otto, but he'd rather rock out to his Grand Funk Railroad tape than bother with her. She tries to get his attention but manages to break his tape in the process, leaving him with no musical options except the kids' rendition of "Old MacDonald Had a Fart" and whatever crap his bus radio is spewing out. At that moment, he sees Metallica's tour bus stranded on the side of the road, but they opt to get a lift from Moleman, who once slept with Lars' grandmother. Oh yeah, and Bart steals the bus.

Enraged, Otto encounters Bart outside the school and spanks him. The corporal punishment is witnessed by Skinner, who instructs Otto to turn in his beaded seat cushion and gun. Until Otto is reinstated, the kids will have to rely on car pooling to get to school. On the first day, Marge takes Bart, Lisa and their friends, including Fat Tony's son, Michael. Since he's the son of a mob boss, everyone is afraid of Michael and wants nothing to do with him, but Lisa sees he's not the hardboiled criminal his father is and befriends him. Michael reveals he wants to be a chef, which upsets his father who wants him to take over the family business.

(S06E25)

Burns: Since the beginning of time, man has yearned to destroy the sun. I will do the next best thing: block it out.

In no episode has Burns been more evil than in the two-parter "Who Shot Mr. Burns" that bridged the sixth and seventh seasons. He becomes so evil in fact, that Smithers actually turns against him, even though it "violates every sycophantic urge" in his body.

But let's not get ahead of ourselves. The episode begins with another normal day at Springfield Elementary, with one minor difference: Super Dude, the classroom gerbil, has died, crushed by his own water bottle. Willy buries the gerbil in the boiler room, assuring the dead rodent that his own father simply got thrown in the bog when he died. Although, didn't his father appear in the season ten episode "Monty Can't Buy Me Love?" Yes, he did, but let's not worry about that, okay? Okay.

(S06E24)

Bart: Mom, you won't believe this, but something you said the other day really got through to me. And now, I'm going to teach some kids a lesson.

Marge: I choose to take that literally.

Bart (from outside): Death to Shelbyville!

Homer: Yes, Bart's a tutor, now. Toot on, son! Toot on!

This is a great way to spend 10 minutes of your Friday. A preview of season 18 of The Simpsons is online today in advance of this weekend's season premiere. FOX made the first seven minutes of Sunday's episode available on various websites, including MySpace.com, FOX.com, and IGNTV.com. The episode is about Homer joining the mob but, in true Simpsons fashion, the first seven minutes are more about Otto than the larger story. And it's pretty damn hilarious-- including a cameo by Metallica. Stick around after the clip because there's more-- a look at a scene as it first appears in pencil and then as the final product. Ahhh... all will be right with the world when The Simpsons return.

(S06E19)

Marge: FOX turned into a hardcore sex channel so gradually I never noticed.

Following an episode I wasn't that thrilled with comes another that's filed in my brain under "Meh." Episodes that show the family in the future always turn me off, and I'm not sure exactly why that is. Maybe I'm just not willing to accept Bart and Lisa as young adults and Homer and Marge as an old couple.

This episode begins with the family at a carnival, and Lisa wanders into a tent featuring bizarre animals, such as a chicken wearing a rainbow wig, a one-headed dog, and an esquilax, a horse with the head of a rabbit, and the body of a rabbit. The rabbit --sorry, esquilax-- escapes, and Lisa chases after it, winding up in a tent with a fortune teller. The first tarot card she places down is the Death card, which frightens Lisa, but the Death card is actually good, it's the Happy Squirrel card she needs to be concerned about.

(S06E18)

Burns: Listen, Spielbergo, Schindler and I are like peas in a pod. We're both factory owners, we both made shells for the Nazis, but mine worked damn it!

This episode opens like any other, with one tiny omission: Matt Groening's name does not appear on the Simpsons' television along with "James L. Brooks" and "Sam Simon." The story goes that Groening and Brooks were at odds over whether to let Jay Sherman from The Critic (a show created by Simpsons peeps Mike Reiss and Al Jean) appear in the episode. Groening felt, and quite rightly I believe, that Jay was not a part of the Simpsons' universe, and didn't belong on the show. A transcribed article about the tiff can be found here.

(S06E17)

Lisa: Hey, dad, whatcha doin'?

Homer: Daddy has very important work to do. He's looking through the want ads to find a part-time job.

Lisa: Dad, that's a gag paper we we got at the carnival.

Homer: Oh. No wonder I didn't hear about Bart being elected 'World's Greatest Sex Machine.'"

This episode begins in Moe's bar with Homer passing out cigars to his friends. It seems he's found the path to financial success by investing in pumpkins. They've been "going up the whole month of October" after all. Naturally, Homer's plan to sell come January fails and he winds up broke. He comes home to find Patty and Selma celebrating their promotion at the DMV, and eventually Homer is pushed to the edge and throws them out. Marge tries to explain to her sisters that Homer is complicated, and Homer pops his head out the window, smashes a plate on his head and yells, "wrong!"

(S06E16)

Bart: Hey guys, just so you don't hear any wild rumors, I'm being indicted for fraud in Australia.

Homer: That's no reason to block the TV.

We get a rather dubious science lesson at the beginning of this episode when Lisa explains to Bart that the water in the sink and toilet always spins in the same direction due to the Coriolis effect. Usually the writers try to be scientifically accurate, but in this case they had to jump on the "water always flows one way in one hemisphere and the opposite direction in the other" bandwagon, or else Bart never would never have called Australia to see which way their toilet drains, and we wouldn't have ourselves one of those "Simpsons go abroad" episodes.

(S06E14) When you see the words "Written by John Swartzwelder" appear on the screen, you know you're in for a great episode.

This episode begins with Bart pulling yet another prank on Principal Skinner by affixing a sign to Skinner's weather balloon that reads, "Hi, I'm big butt Skinner" and is held by a likeness of Skinner constructed so the balloon acts as his butt. Skinner exclaims: "It won't come down for months! Curse the man who invented helium! Curse you, Pierre Jules Cesar Janssen!"

Bart tries to deny he pulled the prank, but the fact that he has blueprints and notarized photos of himself planning it doesn't really help his case. As punishment, Skinner enlists Bart to help him with his amateur astronomy. He tells Bart to meet him at 4:30 the next morning, to which Bart replies, "There's a 4:30 in the morning now?"

(S06E13) This episode, in which we learn how Maggie joined the Simpson clan, is one of my favorites. It manages to be both incredibly funny and incredibly touching, both signs of a great Simpsons episode. Let's jump in:

The plot in a nutshell is that Marge demands the family spend some quality time together, so they look at the family photo album. The kids notice there are no pictures of Maggie, so Homer tells them the story of how Marge's pregnancy changed the course of their lives. Homer starts off by telling his kids that he was at work at the nuclear power plant when a group of freelance terrorists took over, and he defeated each of them in hand to hand combat. Then Marge yells at him to tell the story correctly.

There were no "freelance terrorists," but Homer did terrorize Mr. Burns by quitting his job and riding away on a golf cart while he played Burns' head like a bongo. He also literally burns a bridge as he drives away ("That's for employing me for eight years!"). Homer figures now that he's out of debt he can finally do what he's always dreamed of: work at the bowling alley. Being a "pin monkey" is the highlight of Homer's life, and he doesn't want anything to change it. He even prays to God to freeze everything the way it is, and if He agrees, to "give me absolutely no sign." Leave it to Homer to find a loophole in prayer.