jeffzucker

Did you hear this one, folks? NBC is throwing in the towel. The boss of bosses, NBC Universal CEO, the head honcho himself, Jeff Zucker, was at an industry event recently and declared, "I don't think we'll ever be able to say, 'NBC is number one in prime time.'"

Okay, there it is. The man has given up. He's basically admitting that his product is inferior and he doesn't think he'll ever catch up with his competitors. So, as a TV viewer, I have to wonder why I should invest in anything Zucker churns out at NBC if he doesn't believe that he's ever going to be number one again?

NBC head honcho Jeff Zucker is apparently getting himself involved in the war of the words between CNBC and Jon Stewart. He called Stewart's criticism of the network "absurd" and "unfair."

I hate to admit it, but I actually agree with Zucker to a point. CNBC's reputation did take a beating from this recession, and I wonder if they did hardball the executives like Stewart said they should, the companies could have cut off access and made reporting that much more difficult. I'm not saying CNBC was right in what they did. I'm simply saying that I somewhat understand why.

It's easy for someone like Stewart to call them out on this sort of thing. Being on a network called Comedy Central, most newscasters relegate him to the position of "cable clown." The Daily Show doesn't actually investigate news, unlike CNBC. It does something more akin to a half-hour opinion column based on the work of other news programs.

Ah, 2009. Come in, come in! Have a seat at my crystal ball. Oh, I know it's cracked, but don't worry -- it's still useful.

You are so young, so virile, my little new year. You are also ripe...ripe for me to predict your future. I see plenty in my cracked crystal ball -- yes, yes, it's working just fine. Some of it is good, some is bad, and the rest I can't see because of all the cracks. Those predictions probably don't mean much anyway. I mean, Dustin Diamond being cast in a remake of Cop Rock? Who would believe such tripe?

Oh, don't get up! Yes, Allison gave us her predictions already, but that was with a different ball. So, sit, sit, and let me predict your future in television through my fractured sphere.

I was looking at my last two Festivus wish lists in an attempt to determine if any of my requests came true. Turns out, many of them did come to fruition -- something that I'm damn proud of. Sadly, a new sitcom for Dustin "Screech" Diamond did not materialize. Oh well, maybe that will occur sometime next season when, after coming out of a trance, the NBC executives realize they made a terrible mistake putting Jay Leno on at 10:00 pm and need something to fill the empty space.

Now, without further ado, let me put down the aluminum rod for a bit and talk about my Festivus wish list for the upcoming year.

Oh, Festivus, Oh, Festivus, the holiday for TV fans. How exciting that once a year we can close our eyes, click our heels and make our wishes for the magical ways television can be made better in the year to come. Still, there are more than a few changes that I think need to be made to make TV better ... not to say that it's bad. It just that everything can be better.

This is a great opportunity to get a little Scrooge-y and vent about what I want to see corrected/improved/altered in TV in 2009. Is it wrong that I hope the bigwigs at the networks and cable companies are surfing the net and take my grievances to heart? Is it wrong that I still believe they care about what viewers think? Yeah, probably, but here's my wish list anyway:

I read Brad's post about NBC keeping Jay Leno in the fold and I think it's the latest move by NBC to ruin TV. Can Jeff Zucker be impeached? I'm so fed up with the way he's be running -- ruining -- the network that I'm ready to bust. Seriously, is there anybody over there that still has any connection to what viewers want to see?

Basically, NBC is ready to try something completely radical and -- in my estimation -- ridiculous, even though it would keep Leno from being lured to another network.

You know, it's almost refreshing these days when a network comes out and actually uses the word "canceled." It just happens so rarely these days. Over the last few years, shows have "shut down production," "gone on hiatus," and "filled their production order," but rarely if ever have they been canceled outright. That word is usually reserved for the truly horrible shows (Do Not Disturb) or ones that become spectacular failures (My Own Worst Enemy).

So it's not surprising that when news came out that Lipstick Jungle was going to take a pause in production, everyone -- including our own Isabelle -- assumed the show was canceled. However, a helpful staffer e-mailed us to set us straight (Isabelle updated her post with the info), saying that NBC was going to wait out the show's move to what is usually a Friday "death slot." Indeed, there seems to be a slight uptick in ratings in its new slot, and DVR viewing numbers continue to be solid, so NBC is playing a "wait and see" game with the show.

Looking in from the outside, you might think that Alec Baldwin has the tiger by the tail. He's the star of a critically acclaimed television show. He's winning awards for his work. And, while he's no longer landing those leading man roles in films, over the last few years he's added several good supporting roles to his long list of credits. Apparently, those are not the makings of a happy-go-lucky life.

There is an interesting profile of Baldwin on The New Yorker's website. In a long and thorough piece, Ian Parker talks with Baldwin about his career, his family, mistakes that were made, and things that might have been. Throughout the piece, it becomes clear that he is anything but satisfied. They talk a lot about the film business, and the decisions that shaped the direction of that part of his career. For our purposes here though, the more interesting bits are the discussions of 30 Rock. They include a quote that actually shocked me. Not so much for the sentiment, but for the fact that anyone, even Alec Baldwin, would say it in print. I'll tuck it away after the jump for those of you that have an aversion to f-bombs.

If you're of the belief that actions speak louder than words, than this move by NBC is proof positive that the network has great faith in Chuck. NBC has given Chuck an early full-season pickup.

The term is called a "back-nine" order, which means that the adventures of a geek-turned-reluctant super spy, will be on NBC for all of 2008-09. The vagaries of the demographics and Nielsens notwithstanding, NBC is betting on Chuck.

The comedy-adventure is entering its sophomore season, returning on Monday, September 29, at 8 E.T. Apparently, the powers-that-be at NBC -- Ben Silverman -- have liked the shows that are currently in the can.

Assuming they're right, Chuck will pick up right where it left off last year with sharp characters, funny stories and the right blend of action and laughs. It's not an easy mix, although when it works -- like Chuck and Burn Notice -- it makes for terrific TV.

Everyone thinks they can write. No, really. If you talk to anyone who likes TV and movies, invariably you'll hear that they have a great story. Well, some do and some don't. In the soap business, just about every kind of story has been told.

A show like Passions, which has recently come to an end, told wild tales about witches and sorcery and dwarfs and demons.

General Hospital has been firmly set in plots about mobsters in the manner of The Godfather, with Sonny Corinthos a latter day Michael Corleone.

As the World Turns, currently in its 52nd year, is rooted in traditional love stories and family conflicts, although you have to give them props for Luke and Noah, a frontline gay romance which is definitely a 21st century development.

When I read AOL's Top 20 Best Game Shows of All Time, I pretty much agreed with all the choices. I might have moved Password up a bit, and dropped Who Wants to Be A Millionaire to a lower slot, but the one selection that really made me glower was The Price Is Right as number one.

No, no, not to me. For me, the only choice for numero uno is Jeopardy. It's not a game of chance or luck or random spins of a wheel. It's all about brains and thinking on your feet. And maybe having really fast thumbs. Merv Grifffin's creation remains the best gameshow ever in my book.

As I was thinking about Jeopardy, I realized that for me, the best Jeopardy is not today's Alex Trebek version. I mean, it's great -- don't misunderstand me. It's the one I still prefer to watch today, but my favorite Jeopardy remains the pre-syndication edition, the one that played on NBC daytime from 1964-1975. No, I'm not nuts. I have five very good reasons why I prefer the original, classic Jeopardy.

NBC couldn't have asked for a better Olympian than Michael Phelps. His chase after Mark Spitz's record has been a huge draw for viewers. So, it came as no surprise when I saw that Saturday night, with the record breaking 8th gold, did huge numbers, clocking in with 31.1 million viewers. What did come as a surprise was the big event from 18 years ago that topped Phelps reaching his goal. Surely it had to be something like a big sporting event, a dramatic news special, or something of the sort, right?

Not quite. Saturday, Feb. 24, 1990, 31.4 million viewers tuned in to watch Empty Nest. Wow. That says much more about the growth of cable TV and how the big networks have abandoned Saturday than it does about the success of the Olympics. At a time when half that number is the stuff of a hit show, it seems strange to think that 31 million people were watching Empty Nest.

Is there a bigger star in the world right this moment than Michael Phelps? He's poised to break Mark Spitz's record seven gold medals in one Olympics. He's already the most honored Olympic champion of all times, having won more gold medals than some entire countries.

Jeremy Schaap was singing his praises on ESPN this morning. Michael Phelps is tall, fit, good looking and has the makings of humongous success. Can't you just see him as a TV star?

As Rich pointed out, being an Olympic champion can sometimes be a launching pad for a career on TV. For most, the fit isn't exactly right, but I think that that was the fault of the producers back then, not the Olympians.

Therefore, I'm going to help Michael and those TV bigwigs with a few ideas. Here's four existing shows that should be writing scripts for Michael Phelps right away, and one remake that's right up his alley.

So, you probably heard that the NBC Universal empire will be expanding by one, once it has added The Weather Channel to its media outlets. On MSNBC this morning, the subs on Morning Joe were crowing about CEO Jeff Zucker, sucking up royally, and even hyping GE stock.

It was all really uncomfortable, obvious and out of place when you are tuning in for news, politics, some pop culture and get NBCU corporate cheerleaders in full pom-pom mode.

Okay, enough ranting; there is some news to report. If the deal goes through -- and it will -- Today weatherman Al Roker may be relocating or he'll be repurposed, becoming the face of The Weather Channel.

This morning, as I watched the Today show, I noticed that they had "team coverage" of the big fire on the Universal Studios back lot. Not only did they have reporter Peter Alexander doing a live remote from the scene, but they decided to send Al Roker, who was in L.A. to tape Celebrity Family Feud, over there, as well. Matt Lauer called the fire "devastating," and Alexander went on to list all the sets that went up in smoke, including the town square from Back to the Future. Oh, and some of the video archives were destroyed, even though there are backups.

All of this was delivered in somber tones, as if this was like those wildfires that have enveloped that part of the country over the last few years. It made you wonder if anyone got hurt. Thankfully, no one did. So why the somber tone? Sure, these sets might have some sentimental value, but they're just fake storefronts. And why have a reporter there if Roker was already available? It makes you scratch your head until you realize that NBC and Universal are corporate siblings.