Thursday's return of 30 Rock afforded a pretty fun segue into The Jay Leno Show. 30 Rock has always been a little self-aware, and here they took that to the next level. During the closing credits, Jack (Alec Baldwin) said to Liz (Tina Fey), "Step into the light, Lemon. There's nothing wrong with being fun and popular and just giving people what they want." He then turns directly to the camera and adds: "Ladies and gentlemen, Jay Leno."

Unfortunately, when we cut to The Jay Leno Show, his dancing girls (an homage to Jenna's video in 30 Rock) were better at looking good in their tight shorts than they were at dancing. Then, after Leno came out, we got to overhear a woman wanting to get something signed. "Can I leave it?"

I did enjoy the smooth transition into the show. It creates a sense of synergy on the network where you feel like all these shows are one big happy family. Except for Southland. But I guess there's always that one relative nobody wants around ... Hey, I just wrote a Jay Leno joke!

"Total (Lack of) Recall": Either the House Judiciary Committee loves talking about torture or they haven't been getting any answers during their hearings. Last week, they managed to pull John Ashcroft in for questioning, but they might as well have stayed at home. I can't look at John Ashcroft without thinking of "Let the eagle sooooar", so I'm glad that Jon Stewart brought it up. No mention of Robert Wexler's fantastic "I enjoy cocaine because it's a fun thing to do" from The Colbert Report, but we know everyone was thinking it.

ABC really needs to stage an intervention with the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences. It really does. Because, year in and year out, the Academy puts on an Oscars ceremony that not only runs far longer than the network intends, it just ends up boring the crap out of viewers, many of whom are asleep by the time the real categories are decided.

This year's ceremony ran from 8:30 PM ET (after a Road to the Oscars red-carpet special that was just pointless and dull) to about 12:15 AM. That's 3 hours and 45 minutes of speeches, montages, and musical numbers. My god; even the Grammys aren't that bloated, and it's nothing but musical numbers.

Comedian, actor and former Daily Show correspondent Rob Corddry has a hilarious article on the Suicide Girls Web site about his lifelong battle with being unable to keep his pants dry. I hope this is the first of many funny articles from Corddry, because I need something to read while waiting for my clothes to dry as I sit naked alone in my apartment. To save money, I have only one set of clothes that I wash every day. Anyway, if you're interested in this slice of Corddry's psyche, you can read it here. Also, he likes Lost and John C. Reilly plays heavily into his tale of pee woe.

Corddry's new comedy The Winner is slated to air on FOX sometime next year, his pants permitting.