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April 19, 2014

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Rachael Ray Cracks Up at John Henson's Vibrator Joke During 'Stump the Rach' (VIDEO)

by Nick Zaino, posted Feb 2nd 2011 6:00PM
Rachael Ray It was time to play the awkwardly named "Stump the Rach" on today's 'Rachael Ray' (Weekdays, Syndicated), in which Ray is presented with a mystery product and has to guess what it is. When guest John Henson handed her a green object with two protrusions and a rounded end, he couldn't resist making a vibrator joke.

"I'm going to give you a hint," he said. "It doesn't take batteries."

Ray cracked up, and waved her arms as if to shake off the dirty joke. But soon things came into focus, she Ray realized the mystery object was indeed actually a toothpick holder that looked something like a catcus.

Why, what were you thinking it was?!

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Self-Styled 'Force of Nature' Dominates the 'Wipeout' Course (VIDEO)

by Oliver Miller, posted Aug 3rd 2010 11:10PM
Frank Beasley is a red-headed force of nature. Or, he's a "freak of nature," according to the hosts of 'Wipeout' (Tue., 8PM ET on ABC). Frank is also one of the current contestants on the game show, and he pretty much just rocks out -- starting with a crazy fist-pump when he's at the starting line.

Long-haired Frank then goes on to dominate the course. He avoids such challenges as giant condoms popping out of doors (or at least, that's what it looks like -- we're not really sure), and being punched in the face with boxing gloves. And in the end ...

[Spoiler alert.]

... Frank wins the show! Congrats. He makes this statement upon winning the $50,000 prize: "GHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH." Excellent! And well put, Frank!

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Man Boobs on 'Wipeout' (VIDEO)

by Oliver Miller, posted Jul 22nd 2010 10:40PM
Man Boobs on 'Wipeout'Michael White has "moobs." Or, if you need a translation for that term, he has "man boobs." But as a contestant on 'Wipeout' (Thu., 8PM ET on ABC), he could win $50,000. And what would he use that money for? Why, breast reduction surgery, of course! Yikes.

"Goodbye, boobies!" Michael yells, as he stands at the starting line of the 'Wipeout' obstacle course. But first, host Jill Wagner wants to check this "moobs" situation out. Michael pulls up his shirt, and Jill reaches out towards Mike's pendulous, heaving ... male bosoms. Which is when the 'Wipeout' announcers start screaming: "No! Jill! Cut to Camera Two!"

Will Michael win the contest, and the 50,000 bucks? Will he achieve his impossible dream of getting smaller male breasts? Will he ever reduce his cup size? You'll have to watch the clip to find out.

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A Ballerina Gets Hit on 'Wipeout' (VIDEO)

by Oliver Miller, posted Jul 16th 2010 12:05AM
A Ballerina Gets Hit on 'Wipeout'And we're back with 'Wipeout' (Thu., 8PM ET on ABC). On the latest episode of the series, we get to see the intriguing spectacle of a professionally trained dancer -- who gets punched in the face by objects on a reality TV show.

Contestant Andrea Brache is a professional ballerina. So she's probably very limber and stuff. And that may or may not help her on this show. Will she be a good contestant? Maybe. Or maybe not.

Or maybe -- as seems much more likely -- we might just see her be embarrassed on national television. It's all par for the course on 'Wipeout'!

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A Funke-Ho on 'Wipeout' (VIDEO)

by Oliver Miller, posted Jul 9th 2010 2:40AM
A Funke-Ho on 'Wipeout'Welcome to the land of funny names! On the latest episode of 'Wipeout' (Thu., 8PM ET on ABC), we get to meet Ms. Jessica Funke-Ho. "Funke-Ho," get it? It just sounds very silly.

The 'Wipeout' hosts have a million jokes to make about the poor girl's name. Meanwhile, we get to watch her being knocked off the obstacle course and being bashed into a pool of water, as is pretty standard for players on the game show. But let's return to the whole "Funke-Ho" issue for a second. ... Or would you like to make up your own jokes?

"That is one funky ho," says host Jill Wagner. Meanwhile, Ms. Funke-Ho is busy jumping around on giant balls in the obstacle course. Seriously, if you're having trouble coming up with jokes at this point, then we don't know what to say to you.

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Blob Launch on 'Wipeout' (VIDEO)

by Oliver Miller, posted Jul 6th 2010 10:15PM
Blob Launch on 'Wipeout'Welcome back to 'Wipeout'! It's the reality series that provides you with all your loosely-Japanese-inspired painful game show needs. If you want to see contestants get punched in the face, or be knocked two stories in the air only to fall in a pool of water, then you've come to the right place.

The latest episode of the show (Tue., 8PM ET on ABC) introduces a new version of an obstacle course stunt. It's called the "Blob Launch" and it's ... a giant inflated pillow that sits in the water. People and weights are dropped onto it from several stories up, and the waiting contestant is then launched into the air by the force of the blow, to crash randomly somewhere upon impact.

The show is narrated by John Henson, a truly funny person who was once the host of 'The Soup.' Now, he makes jokes over a soundtrack of fake sound effects. ... Can we all pause to shed a tear for the career of Mr. Henson?

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Does the 1,000th 'Wipeout' Player Win or Lose? (VIDEO)

by Oliver Miller, posted Jul 2nd 2010 12:25AM
Does the 1,000th 'Wipeout' Player Win or Lose?Let's all welcome Quan Pham, the 1,000th contestant on the reality game show 'Wipeout' (Thu., 8PM ET on ABC). He's the 1,000th! Cool. We all like semi-random milestones. But will this be a good milestone or a bad one? Will he win or lose?

Quan starts out strong, ducking obstacles, bouncing on top of giant 'Mario Bros.'-style mushroom things, and even dodging random garbage that is thrown at him by a man dressed up as a knight. (And if you're expecting any of this to make sense, then you're watching the wrong show.) But in the end, Quan ...

... Loses to another guy and does not get the $50,000 prize. Sad! We had such high hopes. Well, maybe the 2,000th player will do better. Or the 3,000th.

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The Winner of 'Wipeout' Is a New Mom (VIDEO)

by Oliver Miller, posted Jun 29th 2010 11:40PM
The Winner of 'Wipeout' Is a New Mom'Wipeout' (Tue., 8PM ET on ABC) is a competitive reality game show featuring a potentially dangerous obstacle course. So naturally, the person you want to throw into that type of scenario is a recent mother who has just given birth.

But magically, it all works out! Jill is the proud mother of a new nine-pound baby. Not only does she survive the obstacle course, but she excels at it. She beats all the other contestants, and wins the $50,000 prize.

As an added benefit, if you want to see a new mom get repeatedly hit in the head and knocked into huge pools of water, well, you've come to the right place. And also, that's a slightly odd thing to want to see, but hey -- this is reality TV.

But seriously, congrats to Jill! That's an incredibly impressive feat on her part, and she won $50,000. Maybe she can put it into a college fund for her new child.

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The Ultimate Wipeout on 'Wipeout' (VIDEO)

by Oliver Miller, posted Jun 22nd 2010 10:40PM
The Ultimate Wipeout on 'Wipeout'Wipeout! Let's see how many times we can use that word in this article.*

The reality game show 'Wipeout' (Tue., 8PM ET on ABC) is often kind of painful and terrifying. If you want to see people being hit in the face and being knocked into pools of mud and water, then you've definitely come to the right place.

The new season of 'Wipeout' has upgraded its obstacle course -- which means even more pain for its contestants. We get to see women and men being horribly pummeled over and over again. Awesome.

And by the way, 'Wipeout' kind of reminds us of a grown-up version of 'Double Dare.' Which leads us to ask this question -- can someone please bring back 'Double Dare'? Does anyone even remember that show? It was great. It featured green slime and kids climbing through twenty-foot tall peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. What a cool, cool show.

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Blind Dates Compete Against Each Other on 'Wipeout' (VIDEO)

by Oliver Miller, posted Jun 1st 2010 11:15PM
Blind Dates Compete Against Each Other on 'Wipeout'It's blind date vs. blind date on the season premiere of 'Wipeout' (Tue., 8PM ET on ABC). Twelve pairs of contestants are paired up for the most bizarro first date ever -- running an obstacle course while repeatedly being squirted with slime.

Contestant Jen says that she's looking for an "athletic" guy, but her blind date partner Paul falls a little short in that department. In the meantime, Jen turns out to be the true athlete, bouncing and backflipping off of giant mushroom-looking things in the obstacle course. It looks like she's in a real-life version of a video game; 'Super Mario Bros.' maybe, for example.

The judges are suitably impressed. "Wow," is the reaction to Jen's performance. "W-O-W."

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'Wipeout' Getting Down and Dirty with Nintendo

by Danny Gallagher, posted Mar 19th 2010 8:05PM
ABC's Do you want to experience the awesome majesty of the 'Wipeout' obstacle course but without having to endure the painful humiliation of having to sacrifice your dignity on national television? Nintendo has the answer.

A video game version of the popular ABC game show is headed to the Nintendo Wii and the DS. An official release date has not yet been set.

David Oxford of Activision Publishing said in a released statement, "Watching ABC's 'Wipeout' on TV is outrageous fun, and viewers can't help but dream of trying the obstacles themselves. We designed the video game with this in mind. 'Wipeout: The Game' brings all of the challenge and laugh-out-loud hilarity without the pain."

I assume he means the emotional pain and not the physical, unless of course someone catches you playing it in public.

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Seven shows that need funny commentators more than American Idol

by Danny Gallagher, posted Sep 22nd 2009 11:05AM
Ellen DeGeneresAmerican Idol's choice of Ellen DeGeneres as a judge replacement threw everyone for a loop, even schlubs like me who don't watch the show.

It's not that she's not talented, successful or funny. It's just an odd choice, putting a comedian on the show that takes its goal of crushing losers' dreams on live television so seriously. It would evoke the same reaction from me if they picked Andrew "Dice" Clay as the new judge, if the Diceman was talented, successful or funny.

And besides, why do they need humor and comedy on such an otherwise serious show? There are lots of humorless, vapid and downright boring shows that are crying out for comedic interjection.

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Wipeout renewed for a third season

by Bob Sassone, posted Jul 22nd 2009 4:30PM
WipeoutAs I've mentioned here before a few times, I'm a fan of Wipeout. It's silly and pretty much boils down to people getting hit by something and falling down into water or mud, but I'm a guy and sometimes I want to watch a show where somebody gets hit by something and falls into water or mud.

A lot of other people like the summer show too, and now ABC has announced that the show has been renewed for a third season.

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Wipeout: Stupid or brilliant?

by Bob Sassone, posted May 28th 2009 3:38PM
WipeoutLast night was the season premiere of ABC's crazy game show Wipeout. I have to admit that it's one of my guilty pleasures. I ignored the show on its first run but started to watch repeats on Sunday afternoons and grew to like the show. The play-by-play is often annoying and I don't know why the contestants have to be so trash-talking and cocky, but it's fun. The new season has new obstacles for people to get through to the $50,000, and I think co-host Jill looks a bit different (though still hot!). What's your take on this show?

What do you think of Wipeout?
It's brilliant!307 (27.8%)
It's stupid!309 (28.0%)
It's probably stupid but I love it anyway489 (44.3%)

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If you want to be on Wipeout, you have to sign a huge release

by Bob Sassone, posted Jul 1st 2008 2:21PM

WipeoutSo I watched a repeat of the first episode of ABC's new game show Wipeout, and I'm not sure what to think of it. Like most American males, I like seeing people* fall from high, wet places and get punched in the face, but I'm not sure how many weeks I can watch the thing. I'm also not happy with the plugged-in comments from the hosts (John Henson and John Anderson) we have to listen to. For every really funny comment there are seven that make you groan. And I wonder if the show will just grow tired after a few weeks.

But there's no denying that there are some wild stunts here. Everytime someone goes sailing off that ramp in the dark or bounces on those giant balls and their body jackknifes and hits the water I'm thinking, these people could easily break their necks. Sure, Survivor has crazy challengs and Fear Factor had nutty stunts, but this stuff seems especially dangerous. And that's why ABC has them sign a 50 page release.

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