On his first (and excellent) album 'No Such Thing,' John Mayer has a song titled 'My Stupid Mouth.' And from what we've heard from Mayer the past several months or so we can see that it's not based on fiction.

This morning on 'Today' (weekdays at 7AM ET on NBC), Mayer talked to Matt Lauer about what he has learned from the various things he has said in public about his life and/or other celebrities (for example, he once described ex-girlfriend Jessica Simpson as "sexual napalm"). That's how TV hosts get a celeb to talk about something juicy and gossipy, disguise it as a question about what that celeb has "learned" from the experience.

It looks like he's wearing pajama bottoms.

On 'The View' (weekdays, syndicated), Jessica Simpson said she's embarrassed by John Mayer's Playboy interview in which he referred to her as "sexual napalm," and she addressed whether a reunion with the musician is possible in the future.

"It's ... embarrassing," Simpson said of Mayer's comment, "because I'll walk into a restaurant or something and I'll notice that more men are looking at me, but I feel like they're undressing me."

Watch the video after the jump.

The gang from 'The View' (weekdays, syndicated) reacts to music John Mayer's recent Playboy interview in which he uses the "N" word multiple times, dishes on sex with ex-girlfriend Jessica Simpson, and calls his penis a "white supremacist" because of his lack of romantic interest in black women.

"If he just put it in a song, probably no one would have even paid attention, but he actually said it, so now we're all up in arms," Elisabeth Hasselbeck said of Mayer's comments. This inspires Whoopi Goldberg to bust out an impromptu ditty on Mayer's privates.

Watch the video after the jump.

A Barack Obama impersonator appeared on 'The Jay Leno Show' last night (weeknights, 10PM ET on NBC), and poked fun at Sarah Palin's use of the imaginary word "mandation" in her critique of Obama's State of the Union address, and John Mayer's comment in a recent Rolling Stone interview that he's "masturbated himself out of serious problems."

"Mandation isn't even a word. It sounds like something our President Bush would say," the impersonator said, then lapsing into a spot-on Bush impression.

I've written many times here about how much I hate the tabloid shows, whether it's Access Hollywood, TMZ, or Entertainment Tonight. One of the worst is ET's sister show, The Insider. Besides having a despicable host (Pat O'Brien -- what's with that little fake laugh he does all the time?) and the lamest writing this side of a junior high student newspaper, it's also evil and dumb.

Take last night's episode. I don't watch the show, but I didn't get to my remote quick enough to change the channel after the news ended and I caught the teaser opening. They showed singer John Mayer with a gun to his head, a rather raw photograph that looked like it was taken across the street from a bank. Was Mayer being held hostage in a holdup? Was one of Jennifer Aniston's exes there telling him not to see her anymore? OMG! Stay tuned to this breaking news!

• At 8, CBS has a new Pirate Master.
• FOX has a new Are You Smarter Than A Fifth Grader at 8, followed by a new So You Think You Can Dance.
• History Channel has a new Mega Movers at 8.
• At 9, USA has a new Starter Wife.
• Lifetime has the new movie My Baby Is Missing at 9.
• There's a new movie on Hallmark at 9 too: Love's Unending Legacy.
• At 10, NBC has a new Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip.
• Sundance Channel has a new Live From Abbey Road at 10, with John Mayer and Norah Jones.

Check your local TV listings for more.

Late last week, I came across an amusing little New York Times article about how the producers of The Office pick the music that is played on the show. It has always fascinated me how much thought seemingly minor aspects of a television show, like the music, are given, and what's played at Dunder-Mifflin is no exception.

According to the article, if the song is new and/or hip, you'll likely won't hear it on the show. The idea is that a) Scranton may be a little behind the curve on new music and that b) since the songs are coming out of speakers and iPods and car radios instead of floating in the background, the selections have to be in tune with what the show's characters like and dislike. Dwight, for instance, probably won't be listening to The Shins or The Decemberists.

During last week's episode of The Office, Michael and Andy sang an... um... interesting rendition of John Mayer's "Your Body Is A Wonderland" to their new Benihana girlfriends. Of course, the show had to get the rights to the song before they could use it. Knowing that his work would be goofed on, John Mayer initially declined to have the song used on the program, one of his favorites. He later reconsidered, after he got some more information from producer BJ Novak... and asked for a Dundie.

Well, it worked, and John Mayer is now a Dundie winner ("Tallest Music Dude"). That was a pretty clever move! Not only did he get his work on one of his favorite shows, but he also made his way into the annals of Dundie history. Nice work, Mayer. I commend you.

On August 29, NBC will launch "NBC News on Stage" on iTunes, which will include the Today live summer concert footage of John Mayer performing three songs from some album I'm never going to purchase. If Mayer isn't your cup of tea, other programs to be added to the list include interviews with the Rolling Stones, Jerry Garcia, U2, Judy Garland, Johnny and June Carter Cash, Madonna, and Ray Charles. NBC is not offering this or any of its news programming on iTunes for free, which, to quote Mother Theresa, is a big stupid load of crap. The John Mayer segment, which will also feature interviews and behind-the-scenes stuff, will cost $3.99 and will only be available for a limited time.