(S18E05)

Homer: I'm not gonna surrender. You've seen what the U.S. Army does to prisoners. How would you like to be stacked naked in a pile with a hillbilly girl pointin' at you and laughin'?

Cletus: That was our last Christmas card.

Homer: Yeah, Marge always loved your cards.

If you missed the premiere of the Simpsons Movie trailer, check it out here. July can't get here soon enough, and being in Minnesota, I mean that in more ways than one.

This Wednesday, CNN is broadcasting a two-hour special hosted by Christiane Amanpour that will track Osama Bin Laden from his early days to his current status as the world's most wanted terrorist leader. Normally I don't bother with basic cable news coverage, but I like Amanpour as a reporter, and based on the clips on the Web page for In the Footsteps of Bin Laden, this looks like it might be quite informative and interesting. Amanpour and her crew traveled to ten countries on four different continents in order to follow Bin Laden's journey, and, little surprise, trying to get coverage and speak to those close to the man wasn't without its dangerous moments. The special will air August 23 at 9 pm.

(S06E12)

Marge: Kids can be so cruel.

Bart: We can? Thanks, mom! (runs into Lisa's room and attacks her)

This episode does a great job of satirizing Freemasons, a fraternal order whose secretive membership makes it ripe for conspiracy theories and assorted rumors about its role in shaping historical events. The truth, most likely, is probably not nearly that exciting.

In this episode Homer joins a masonic-like society called the Stonecutters after stalking Lenny and Carl to find out why they're getting so many perks, such as vibrating chairs at work and great parking spaces. Since his father was a Stonecutter, Homer is automatically allowed to join, but he does have to go through a hazing ritual, which includes being paddled on the ass repeatedly and being blindfolded and pushed off a platform that's allegedly five stories off the ground, but is really just a few inches from the floor. Ironically, Homer actually falls through the floor, and the next five floors, as well.