nancy botwin

The MILF has become a staple of the modern male's sexual appetite, along with groveling and porn.

How did this evolution occur? Did the average young male grow tired of trying to impress shallow women their own age who wouldn't pay attention to them if a shark was eating them? Were older women going broke from the rising cost of chlorophyll? What chemical imbalance caused this carnivorous and shallow love affair and how can I increase it without melting my brain in the microwave?

Maybe the true answer is like opening the Ark of the Covenant. The only way to walk away from its truth unscathed means not opening your eyes to it. So here are the hottest TV moms who could make any guy turn his knob in their direction (thanks to the digital switch, that innuendo no longer works so enjoy that image I put in your head).

Oh my. So much to be thankful for, even though the fall season hasn't been all that great. Here's my list:

Rogue agents. It's been Far.Too.Long since Jack Bauer has entered our living room, and we couldn't be more gleeful about his return - both the 24 movie and the series in January. Welcome back, Jack! We missed you! Well, my son and I have! My daughter and husband don't get you, but that's ok!

Mad scientists. That crazy Walter Bishop really brightens up our Tuesday nights around here. My son goes to school on Wednesday, talks about Fringe with his buddies, then texts me back their thoughts on The Observer, the cylinders, Massive Dynamic and all the rest. Of course, Walter is the best thing about the show. We love him.

Have you been jonesing for the entourage from Entourage? Do you need a little Ari Gold to get your blood flowing? Well, new shows aren't coming back until September (thanks to the writers' strike), but HBO is giving fans a chance to enjoy the most recent shows starting tomorrow, July 4th. Every Friday at 10 p.m. (ET) on, HBO will replay season 3: part 2, and season 4.

That's good to know -- especially in these dog days of summer TV -- but if you want to know what's going to happen next, read on. Both Jerry Ferarra and Kevin Connolly, Turtle and E, got a little chatty with OK! magazine's Oliver Coleman.

If you don't want to know how things are going to unfold in season five, don't read after the jump.

It's official, Weeds fans! Right when everyone was getting paranoid that Showtime might leave viewers in a lurch, they've given the greenlight for a season three with fifteen new episodes in the works.

The show's recent season finale was the most watched in the series' short history. It was the kind of cliffhanger Lost only wishes it could muster these days. Nancy and Conrad are screwed in the Tarantino, multiple guns pointed at them kind of way. Silas is on the verge of being busted with enough weed in his trunk to keep Snoop Dogg's crew happy for a long time. Shane is halfway to Costa Rica with Andy's loony tunes ex-girlfriend. Doug and Dean are mid-tussle on the Botwin floor, and poor Peter is nowhere good.