new tv

Like Andy Rooney, I'm not impressed when someone tells me that they don't watch television. They're not smarter or happier or "better off." They just don't own a television, for some reason I'm not really clear on. Do they think they'll get addicted to it? Do they think there's nothing good on TV? Did a television attack them when they were a kid?

William Hamilton (who used to write the cool Shaken & Stirred column for The New York Times), has an essay where he describes buying a television for the first time in 32 years. The last one he had was a black and white portable in 1974. He just bought a 40 inch Sony Bravia flatscreen.

My TV set is dying.

I noticed it Thursday morning when I turned it on and Martha Stewart had two heads. She was also all blue/green and white and red. At first I thought it was some sort of Christmas-themed show, but this wasn't a "good thing," and when I changed the channel I saw that Rachael Ray looked the same, and so did the anchors on CNN.

I have a 52 inch Toshiba, and checking the instruction manual (which I had to dig out of storage - who the hell has trouble with their TVs this day and age?) I found out that the problem was the "Touch Focus." That sounds a lot like the title of a softcore porn movie, but it actually has to do with how the red/green/blue lines up in the spectrum. Following the instructions, I tried to fix it manually, but the Toshiba customer service rep on the phone says that's because it's too much out of line and I have to have a repairman come to the house. Either that or just get a new set, which is probably what we'll do.