Let's talk (again) about commercials we hate.

Or maybe I should say commercials I hate, though I think you'll agree with me on some of these. They run the gamut from silly to ineffective, from dumb to just plain jaw-dropping. Let's start with jaw-dropping.

1. DirecTV's Poltergeist ad. This is...creepy and tasteless. Do the makers of this ad really not know that young Poltergeist star Heather O'Rourke died at a really young age? Even if they didn't (I'm kidding, of course they did), the star of the ad, Craig T. Nelson, is aware of it. So why use footage of her in the ad? It's just bizarre to me. Then again I'm not a DirecTV exec. They must know that what they're doing by using footage of a deceased child star (and a stand-in) to sell satellite TV service.

(S03E09) "If I hadn't of been here, you'd have whatever disease Hepatitis Bob has!"

How stoked was I to see Craig T. Nelson again? I was never a fan of Coach and I thought Nelson could do a lot better. It's great to see him on a show where he can really make people laugh.

I had all but forgotten about Liberty & Ray Ray. Their re-appearance. however, answers the question I had about how the writers will deal with a new baby. They won't. Just like when Phoebe had her brother's babies, Joy will give birth and we'll never see that kid again, except maybe during sweeps.

(S03E06) I think that most people probably thought of Red Foreman when they saw Kurtwood Smith in the previews for this episode. Any actor that does a role for that long is going to be tied to it to some degree. Especially if it is something like That 70's Show which is in syndication so you are constantly stumbling over it. But it is a credit to Kurtwood that while I was secretly hoping for him to call someone a dumb-ass the whole time, he made Edward Cooper something completely different.

Cooper is an interesting character. At once the hero, and the villain. I suspected going in that there would be some butting of the heads as his clinical studying of the evidence clashed with Allison's visions. And we did get some of that. It was made even better with the first round going to Cooper. He was so smarmy and confident as he shot Allison down again and again. It seemed to set up perfectly for Allison to eventually be proven right and get the "I told you so" moment that she wanted so badly.

Boo! Did I scare you? Well, if I didn't that's okay. I'm not much into scaring people since I gave Uncle Barry that heart attack at last year's Halloween party by putting a bloody finger into his apple-tini. Eh, Barry deserved it; he was always a putz. And constantly asking for money. I mean, one time . . .

Sorry, wandered off for a bit there. What was I talking about? Oh, yes, scaring people. There's really no need for me to scare anyone this upcoming Halloween since my good old friend television can do it much better. In fact, now that there are so many channels to choose from, you can watch hours of blood and gore and ooze into the wee hours of the morning while noshing on all of the 'good' candy that your children bring back (this would be anything from the Hershey or M&M/Mars family of candies).

So, to make your life a bit easier while you come down from that sugar buzz, we here at TV Squad have provided you with a comprehensive list of Halloween-themed programming that will be airing on from about dinnertime on October 31st into the first of November. It's all there, from the Halloween and Friday the 13th films (and their numerous sequels) to Halloween-themed Roseanne episodes, to classic Vincent Price movies such as House of Wax. We even mention Dark Town, which airs at 3:15 am on Wednesday, November 1st. In Dark Town a lesbian and a gangbanger team up to battle vampires. Gosh, what will the entertainment industry think of next?

The complete (or as near as complete list) can be seen right after the scary jump. Ooh!

(S05E16) So I'm sitting in my new apartment, all alone, it's quiet as hell, and I'm watching the opening of The Family Guy and they show a scene from JAG. And I laughed, very loudly, all alone in my apartment. I felt kinda silly, but when Mac asks Harm if anyone even watches the show anymore and he says, "not really, they don't really pay attention" then looks at the camera and says "Remember the forties?" I just lost it.

Sure, JAG isn't even on anymore, but it was still funny.