sag awards

You are not a true tabloid celebrity unless all of your roads lead towards a one way ticket to rehab. Celebrities wear their Chanel sunglasses and hats low, like a badge of courage, as they are driven in their chauffeured SUV's through the Mojave Desert on their way to places with names more appropriate for a nursery school than to a place for those down the downward spiral of celebrity excess.

Common pre-requisites for rehab include an undying love for cocaine, a struggle with food or a co-dependency on the bottle.

But say you don't have a problem with any of the above and find yourself being publicly scrutinized by society who seek a social remedy for your reprehensible behavior on national television?

We make foul discriminatory language a new reason for rehab and make Isaiah Washington our example.

Unfortunately for Washington, one of the side effects of going to rehab for foul language is being the butt of many jokes, from Wanda Sykes on Ellen to even your own co-worker at The SAG Awards.

It's only a matter of time before we find Harry Potter in rehab. Let me be the first to make this prediction after his...

Actors really take themselves seriously, don't they? They don't even like to call a female performer an actress. Only actors allowed.

The SAG Awards are always a bit of a downer, since we already saw all these people at the Golden Globes. And pretty much the same people won again. The only pleasant surprises were The Office winning for Best Ensemble in a Comedy Series and Little Miss Sunshine taking the movie cast award. Here are the winners:

Female Actor in a TV Movie or Miniseries
Helen Mirren, Elizabeth I

Male Actor in a TV Movie or Miniseries
Jeremy Irons, Elizabeth I

Following a recent screening of the Weeds second season finale and Q&A session for SAG members, E Online's Kristin Veitch summed up the proceedings and may have even hinted at a scoop our readers had already surmised for themselves.

While the Q&A was more about the cast reminiscing and speculating about their characters and the shooting of the second season, I would be remiss not to tell you that you follow the jump at your own peril.

The more interesting revelations of the SAG screening included (WARNING: SPOILERS AHEAD):

The 12th annual Screen Actors Guild Awards were held tonight. We listed the nominees in television categories earlier this month, and here are the winners:

Outstanding Performance by a Male Actor in a Television Movie or Miniseries: Paul Newman / Empire Falls

Outstanding Performance by a Female Actor in a Television Movie or Miniseries: S. Epatha Merkerson / Lackawanna Blues

Outstanding Performance by a Male Actor in a Drama Series: Kiefer Sutherland / 24

Outstanding Performance by a Female Actor in a Drama Series: Sandra Oh / Grey's Anatomy

Outstanding Performance by a Male Actor in a Comedy Series: Sean Hayes / Will & Grace

Outstanding Performance by a Female Actor in a Comedy Series: Felicity Huffman / Desperate Housewives

Outstanding Performance by an Ensemble in a Drama Series: Lost

Outstanding Performance by an Ensemble in a Comedy Series: Desperate Housewives

See the full list (including the winners in movie categories) at TBS.com [Thanks Seth!]