the aristocrats

Some of the rogues in the 1995 film classic 'The Usual Suspects' have made their way to TV recently. Kevin Spacey and Gabriel Byrne have put in time at HBO (on 'Recount' and 'In Treatment,' respectively). Stephen Baldwin has become a reality staple on such shows as 'Celebrity Apprentice' and 'I'm a Celebrity, Get Me Out of Here' (we get it, Stephen, you're a celebrity.)

But today, Kevin Pollak took us by surprise by teaming up with reality titan Mark Burnett on a new game show.

'Our Little Genius' will premiere on Jan. 13 in TV's most enviable time slot: right after the first Paula-less 'American Idol' on Fox. Pollak will host 'Genius,' which will feature child prodigies showing off their knowledge for cash prizes.

The "Balloon Boy" incident, the cleanest name I can give this monumental media f#*$#-up, sounded vaguely familiar to me. In fact, it sounded more like the setup to a classic joke with an incredibly unfunny punchline.

It seems the folks at Countdown with Keith Olbermann noticed that as well and turned the whole thing into another umpteenth retelling of the classic "Aristocrats" joke. If you're not familiar with the infamous joke about a family walking into a talent agent's office, search for it on YouTube. But don't come whining to me that your ears won't stop bleeding.

Paul Provenza is what comics would call a "comic's comic," so he's a perfect pick for Showtime's new comedian chat show.

The comedian and film director will host a new Showtime show next year called Behind the Green Room Door. It's a talk show featuring a rotating panel of comics having the kinds of hardcore conversations that can only be heard in dressing rooms and empty comedy club bars.

And if you've never been to a comedy club, then you can get an idea of the conversation when you realize Provenza directed the acclaimed comedy documentary The Aristocrats. And if you've never heard of The Aristocrats and you're sensitive to foul language, you might want to see if your DVR comes with ear plugs and a soul scraper.

Mark your calendars. Sarah Silverman's much-delayed Comedy Central show The Sarah Silverman Program will finally get its debut on February 1st at 10:30pm. A six-episode run of the program was scheduled to premiere this past summer - capitalizing on the positive press Silverman garnered for her concert film Jesus is Magic and her appearance in the documentary The Aristocrats. I suppose Comedy Central thought the market for clever, offensive comedy from beautiful women was saturated last summer so they waited to spring the goods on us in '07.

Silverman's television outing was conceived by Silverman along with Dan Harmon and Rob Schrab - names comedy fans may remember as being responsible for the failed Fox pilot turned cult favorite Heat Vision and Jack.

Just when we think that Bob Saget has moved into the realm of the cool, he reverts back to the lame-ass form he displayed through most of the eighties and nineties.

Case in point: fresh off a career-changing appearance in the filthy-joke documentary The Aristocrats, and on the heels of directing the forthcoming satire Farce of the Penguins, Saget has been signed to host... a game show. Saget has signed to host NBC's game show 1 Vs. 100, based on a worldwide hit show that pits one contestant against 100 in a trivia contest. Because NBC sees this as a companion to Deal or No Deal, they figured they should follow the same formula: hire a stand-up comedian with some edge and a ready-made TV fanbase.

So, will we get a TV-fied version of the edgy Saget from the last few years, or the bland, unfunny Saget we saw on Full House and America's Funniest Home Videos? Who would you rather see?

[thanks to bobsagetisgod.com for the pic!]

Of course, your interest in this probably depends on how much you can stand the humor of Gottfried. Me? I've always found him rather humorous, whether it's guest appearances on sitcoms, game show, or his Aflac commercials.

It probably helps if you read his blog entries the right way. Just close your eyes and imagine the blog entries being read by Gottfried in that voice of his. Oh, wait, if you close your eyes you won't be able to see the blog. OK, try this: read the words but still try to imagine it being read in his voice. Yeah, that'll be better.