Oh, now they've gone too far.
The crazy "let's remake an old TV show and put it on the big screen!" mania continues. Magnum, P.I. is coming to the big screen, and it now has a writer and director. It's Rawson Marshall Thurber (Dogdeball).
I have absolutely no confidence that this will be a good movie. Nothing against the director. I'm talking about the whole concept of remaking TV shows for the big screen. To put it bluntly, who the fuck wants to see a big screen Magnum movie without Tom Selleck? Maybe he'll be in it, but I seriously doubt it. They'll go younger, hipper, edgier, with rap on the soundtrack (see also: Miami Vice).
Studio execs are clueless. The reason why certain shows are beloved in the first place is because of a specific time, a specific place in history, a specific cast. It's not that Charlie's Angels, the original show, was such a great concept or plot, it's that it was that three specific actresses and the 1970s. People liked it back then because of the T and A, and they like it now for the nostalgia/kitsch value. Bringing it back and just putting three other actresses in it? That's why it sucked. Same with The Fugitive, The Beverly Hillbillies, I Spy, and a ton of others.
(Hell, this Magnum flick might turn out to be a good "movie," but it won't be Magnum, P.I.)
And the worse part? This pretty much means any future TV reunion movie with Selleck, Hillerman, Manetti, et al has no chance of ever becoming a reality.
I don't have a bad life, but there are just so many characters on TV I'd love to be. Here are the top five:
- Rob Petrie (The Dick Van Dyke Show): Writer for a hit TV show in New York City by day, and then he comes home to an ultra-cool home at night to eat dinner with Mary Tyler Moore. I want to be Rob Petrie.
- Thomas Magnum (Magnum, P.I.): I'm not even a warm-climate sort of guy, but I can imagine being a private eye (sorry, private investigator, as Magnum himself would correct me) on Oahu, living on an outrageous estate with my own private quarters and a red Ferrari. Yeah, I can picture that.
- Bugs Bunny: Independent wise-ass. I'd probably put on some pants though.
- Kelly Robinson or Alexander Scott (I Spy): To travel around the world on someone else's dime, drinking and swingin' and fightin' spies. Sounds cool to me.
- Charlie (Two and a Half Men): This guy never seems to be doing his job (writing commercial jingles) because he's too busy drinking and bedding beautiful women, but he still seems to make a boat load in cash. Sign me up.
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