The last week ever of Late Night with Conan O'Brien was bound to include a few shockers. And while I'm still hoping that one of them won't be the failure to launch of Andy Richter's homecoming, another bigger staple came to an end and was probably followed by a long nap and an anthill of shame and loneliness.

Conan held a going away sketch for one of the show's most popular and least marketable characters, the Masturbating Bear.

If you haven't seen this infamous character "in action," feel yourself (not that way sicko) among the fortunate because it's one of the most hilarious and personally shameful moments you will ever experience in your life. Greater even than your prom, your cousin's drunken wedding and your first college beer party where you woke up with one less eyebrow combined.