I know what you're thinking. Even if you don't watch TV you're going to die. We're all going to die. Happy New Year!

But a recent study by the Baker IDI Heart and Disease Institute and published in Circulation: Journal of the American Heart Association (which is my second favorite magazine after Cat Fancy) says that the more we watch TV, the greater our risk of dying from all sorts of things. Every hour that we spend in front of the tube increases cardiovascular diseases risk by 18% and cancer by 9%. Overall it's an 11% increase. And these increases are across the board and not affected by heart problems, disease or any other conditions you might already have.

Another month, another study on how TV is bad for us.

The latest comes from The University of Maryland, where sociologists looking over 30 years worth of data have concluded that people who watch a lot of television are unhappy. People who say that they are very happy read more and socialize more.

Oh, this is bogus on so many levels.

I like articles that are so ridiculous that even after the very first sentence, you know you don't have to read on:

"Five and six year old children who watch television, especially police dramas, news broadcasts, and movies directed at adults, have a markedly increased risk of sleep problems, a new study suggests."

To quote many a philosopher: duh!

Seriously, is this news to anyone? Five year olds that watch scary cop dramas and the news have sleep problems? I also hear that poking five year olds with a stick and having a giant stranger come into their room at night to scream at them will affect their sleep habits too.

Maybe the kids don't know about Carson Daly's show. They should watch that if they want to get to sleep.