Halloween Week brought with it a theme of unity and a temptation of candy on 'The Biggest Loser' (Tue., 8PM ET on NBC). The ten remaining finalists were told they were competing as a single unit this week. If they could lose a combined 100 lbs, then no one would be going home.

!!SPOILER ALERT!!

As a temptation, a bucket filled with ten lbs of candy was hung in the kitchen. For every pound of it someone ate, they would earn a pound advantage on the scale. While none of them seemed to seriously consider eating the candy too much, they did come up with a way to unite in a prank against Bob -- only they may not have thought it all the way through.

Have you heard? Americans are really fat. I know that's a generalization, but seemingly everywhere I turn I'm hearing how fat we are as a nation -- from educators, scientists, my mom, the full-length mirror in my bathroom. It was always easy for me to ignore the whispers of nationwide obesity, even as they turned into firm scolding then into outright screaming, but you know how I know it's a concern of gargantuan proportions? It's on TV.

How can you tell when an issue has turned from mild concern into full-blown epidemic? When you can't turn on the telly without seeing a show on every channel. In this case, there are now roughly a thousand shows about fat people losing weight and getting healthy. The question becomes: is it a call to actually tone flabby arms and get healthy, or an exploitative endeavor to help our rotund masses reassure themselves that "even I wouldn't eat that?"

(S09E11) Well, all hell broke loose at the Biggest Loser ranch this week. There was so much chaos going on, we didn't even get time for a normal challenge, which isn't to say there wasn't a challenge, and there weren't two people with immunity this week. But I'm getting way ahead of myself.

As promised, we got to see a lot of familiar faces, and a couple of not-so-familiar faces, as the eliminated contestants returned yet again for a chance to return to campus. It was a little odd seeing some of them at a size that is clearly before what we saw in their "after elimination" packages.

The return was especially difficult for the original blue team, Cherita and Victoria Andrews, as neither of them have had the opportunity to spend even one full night as part of 'The Biggest Loser' on-campus experience.

'The Biggest Loser' (Tue., 8PM ET on NBC) has to be one of the most emotional shows on TV right now. Our relationship with food is such a strange and interesting thing, and the contestants have to work through all their issues on national television.

On this week's episode, the eliminated players were given a chance to return to the ranch, and Victoria drew the lucky straw on that score. She was so grateful to have the opportunity to come back and change her life for the better. It's easy to get excited and emotional for her, even sitting in our living rooms at home.

Watch the video after the jump.

Last year, the idea of putting the New York Jets on HBO's 'Hard Knocks' documentary series might have seemed a poor choice. They had a rookie head coach, a rookie -- albeit high profile -- starting quarterback, and they were coming off a less than stellar, no-playoffs season.

This year, however, it's a whole 'nother story. The Jets are smokin'. As a Miami Dolphins fan, this pisses me off like you can't imagine. But for HBO, the New York Jets are a great pick for 'Hard Knocks,' the show that takes viewers into the training camp of an NFL team to watch them put it together for season to come.

'The Biggest Loser' (Tue., 8PM ET on NBC) often gets emotional, but this episode might have been the most emotional yet.

Michael cracked the 400 lb. mark, dropping to 397 lbs, and wept as he said it was for his grandma. "I'm getting there. I'm getting there," he said. "I worked my tiny little butt off when I was in Chicago. It was my way to, like, run away from the pain."

As trainer Bob Harper said, "It doesn't even matter if Michael wins this show or not. Michael has already won this game." And he's inspired a whole bunch of other people along the way. Way to go, Michael! We're cheering for you!

Watch the video after the jump.

'Work Week' on 'The Biggest Loser' (Tue., 8PM ET on NBC) found the contestants inspiring their co-workers.

Here's the thing about this show. Yes, it does seem like most of the contestants do well because they've got Jillian and Bob and a whole team of people helping them. Not to mention the fact that they're cordoned off at the ranch, so they don't have to worry about all those pesky life distractions.

But it's segments like this that really bring the show home to all of us in a real way. Weight loss and healthy living is absolutely achievable, and it's really up to each person to set and achieve their goals. Thus ends our 'Oprah' moment of the day.

Watch the video after the jump.

Man, it's gotta be tough when you gain weight on 'The Biggest Loser' (Tues., 8PM ET on NBC). That's what happened with Melissa this week, and she was sent home. But hey, at least she's still under 200 lbs. She'll be alright.

Meanwhile, Cheryl and Darrell battled each other in an elimination challenge that involved balancing a torch on their head. Ok, that's just not right. Not only does it seem really dangerous, but are they trying to give the contestants a closed head injury?

Watch the video after the jump.

If you haven't seen the recent Jenny Craig commercial that features Valerie Bertinelli in a lab, wearing an official-looking lab coat and touting the benefits of Jenny Craig over "the largest weight loss program" (wink wink), here it is. Weight Watchers is suing Jenny Craig for what they say is bogus medical information in the ad.

I hate ads that show someone in a lab coat or standing in front of a bunch of books. Ooooo, he's in front of a bookcase, he must know what he's talking about!

[via Gawker]

Nobody can accuse Jason Alexander of not being honest about himself. The actor has not been happy with the way he's been looking of late and he's going to do something about it. Jason Alexander is the new spokesman for Jenny Craig. Not only is it "no soup for you," Jason, it's also no more big salad, too. (Unless the size of Jenny Craig meals have been supersized and nobody told me about it!)

Jason is the latest Jenny Craig celebrity pitcher, joining Sara Rue and Valerie Bertinelli. I can't wait to see Jason in a Speedo like Valerie in the bikini! No, seriously, Jason's goal with the diet is clearly all about shrinkage. He wants his old waistline, the one that made George Costanza such a catch.

A&E, the cable network that is slowly becoming no arts nor entertainment, has signed on another tabloid favorite celebrity to bare her life for the camera.

Kirstie Alley will join the network's neverending list of celebrity reality shows. This one will focus on her neverending battle with weight loss as she raises her kids. The network has ordered 10 episodes of the new series.

In other words, it's every other family-related reality show you've ever seen except this one will star Kirstie Alley.

Eliminations on The Biggest Loser are always heart-wrenching. Much as the contestants hate being away from their families, they've made the decision to try out for the show, and once they're there, the last thing they want to do is go home and back to their unhealthy habits.

Many of them truly are fighting for their life, and you just know that without the motivation of laying it all out there on TV -- not to mention the grueling paces that Bob and Jillian put them through -- some of them might never gain control over their weight.

And no, before someone says it, she does not need to shut her yapper because of her love/hate relationship with food... although, that probably wouldn't hurt. Now before I say something else that may be construed as offensive, let me preface all of this with exactly what I said the last time I complained about someone on The Biggest Loser:

"Because what I'm about to write may come across as sounding harsh and insensitive, let me preface all of this by saying that I love The Biggest Loser and have nothing but the utmost respect for the contestants and what they go through on the show.

In a world saturated with reality shows, The Biggest Loser is one of the few that still comes across as "real." You can't script a 100lb. weight loss."

OK, the formalities are out of the way, so let's get to the point: why is Heba being such a bitch?!?

(S05E01) Is there a word that describes the feeling of "missing fictional characters?" If not, there ought to be one. Flurj, maybe, to take a word from last week's wonderful SNL cold open. As in, "I don't know about you guys, but I flurjed the hell out of Jim and Pam and Michael and Dwight all summer long."

What about you guys? Did you flurj your friends at The Office? Well, everything is a-okay now. Your fictional friends from Dunder-Mifflin are back, and your good buddy Jay (quite possibly fictional, we're working it out in therapy) is back reviewing every episode mere seconds after it's aired! So, sit back, relax, and sharpen your commenting fingers! On to the review!

Star Jones has finally admitted that she lost a bunch of weight thanks to gastric bypass surgery that she had in 2003. There's a shocker. The former co-host of The View admits to the surgery in an article she wrote for the upcoming September issue of Glamour magazine.

Jones lost 160 pounds over three years. She says she didn't announce she had gastric bypass surgery because she felt ashamed that she couldn't lose the weight on her own. I can understand that, but she went as far as to lie about it and give people false hope that they, too, could control their problem with over-eating. I'm surprised she's not writing a book about it to make money off her weight loss. Does anybody else think she's just a bad person?

So, there. The world's biggest mystery is solved.