wipeout-hd

Do you want to experience the awesome majesty of the 'Wipeout' obstacle course but without having to endure the painful humiliation of having to sacrifice your dignity on national television? Nintendo has the answer.

A video game version of the popular ABC game show is headed to the Nintendo Wii and the DS. An official release date has not yet been set.

David Oxford of Activision Publishing said in a released statement, "Watching ABC's 'Wipeout' on TV is outrageous fun, and viewers can't help but dream of trying the obstacles themselves. We designed the video game with this in mind. 'Wipeout: The Game' brings all of the challenge and laugh-out-loud hilarity without the pain."

I assume he means the emotional pain and not the physical, unless of course someone catches you playing it in public.

A good show can keep you so entertained that you're willing to fight sleep to watch the rest of it. A great show physically keeps you awake.

It gets into your bloodstream and forces more adrenaline into your heart.

It turns the synapses in your brain into ferrets on espresso that dash back and forth between the lobes and fires your mind on all of its cylinders.

It is visual cocaine, which is much healthier than actual cocaine and doesn't require a frequent visitor punch card for an eyes, ears, nose and throat doctor.

These are the shows that assault all five of the senses or less depending on how good of a health plan you've got.